Too many ‘Sheng politicians’ but no youth agenda

No, I am not talking about picking sides and doing whatever they want. No, I am not talking about that so calm down people. I am talking about helping them pick better names for their political parties.

First there was Raphael Tuju with “Poa” and now there is UDF, Musalia Mudavadi’s party with its tagline “Niko Freshi”.

These old dudes who still walk around with the “Youth” tag all over them think this is 2002. What’s with these useless attempts at Sheng to try and court the youth vote?

I don’t know of any youth today who would be attracted by slogans like “Poa” and “Niko Freshi”. Well, actually, there are, any youth who is above 50 years.

Every politician wants to sound cool in their logo but any attempt to look and maintain this image is seriously thwarted by the same old “youth” who dominate these parties.

Have you seen the caps they don? Seriously, are we incapable of making “cooler” caps or is it a crime? Do you pay less taxes when you bring in caps that look like they were designed by a drowning man?

I am yet to see a politician with the kind of, allow me to use this term, swagger in Kenya. You have better luck sighting a four leaved clover than a “cool” politician.

Even Sonko doesn’t have it and yes, even Tuju, Kalonzo, Peter Kenneth et al. We all know they are not about that life and what makes them cool is the fact that they have money, lots of it.

The kind of swag that we need is not about you talking Sheng, no, you need to ooze it. We need to see it in you dear politician. Wearing bling doesn’t make you cool, no.

So that’s why they can’t talk to the youth in Kenya. They only attract the kind that adores them for their wealth. Tribalism aside, which one Kenyan politician gunning for the top seat can you say is youthful in terms of cool?

Of course I know being “cool” makes not a good president, but it kinda helps. The reason why every politician in Kenya wants to emulate Barack Obama is because that guy is cool.

He is 50, he does not pass as young, he looks young but better, you can see he is a cool guy even away from politics and that is hard.

So back to the slogans, what kind of names can we get our dear old youthful politicians? I suggest someone drops some major bucks on Mbusi from Ghetto Radio for his “Hakuna Mbrrrrr” and other tags that I don’t even know what they mean whenever I listen to him and Bonoko.

They need slogans like “Hakuna Wow wow, Nikufyam, Nikulonzero and many others. The thing about using Sheng is that you run the risk of sounding fake.

Sheng changes everyday and a word that is popular today will be “old” tomorrow and by choosing it, you will look ancient in a month. Just act your age, the youth are also appealed to by age but only if you talk with us not to us.

Have you realised that most of these politicians have no agenda for the youth? They talk about employment, they don’t say how, they talk about advancement, they don’t tell us how? Most want to be president just because they have been politicians long enough.

They are so ambiguous because they think by having a Sheng word somewhere in their party, they are a youthful party. Enough with the Sheng, let’s get to the details can we?

Let’s talk Sheng when we meet at rallies but let the discussion be honest and straight forward. I am yet to find a politician who will appeal to me without sounding fake and forced.