Wedding ring: Meaningless symbol or priceless token?

• According to ancient beliefs, a very vital blood vessel ran from the fourth finger of the left hand directly to the heart. The vein was named Vena amori, Latin for “the vein of love”.
• The Egyptians and Romans believed that the wedding ring, which symbolised eternal love, would best be worn on that finger. The practice of referring to that particular finger as the ring finger endured over the years.
• At first, only women wore wedding rings. During World War Two, men facing long separations from their wives began to wear wedding bands as a symbol of their marriages and as a reminder of their wives. Christian missionaries spread the tradition to Kenya.

It is one of the focal pints of a modern day wedding ceremony; a circular piece of shiny metal that is one of the most enduring symbols of marriage.

Regarded as more than just an ornament, it marks the joining of two individuals into a married couple.

And as December, one of the traditional wedding months in Kenya, draws near, many engaged couples are working on the finer details of their wedding ceremonies.

Among the items being readied are the must-have wedding bands to be exchanged during the ceremony.

There are designs to be chosen and fittings to be done to ensure the ring, usually golden, glides on smoothly as the lovebirds declare: With this ring I thee wed.

There is no legal requirement that a couple has to exchange rings for their marriage to be valid, but the centuries old tradition continues to be observed as part of modern wedding rituals.

But is the ring still a significant symbol of marriage? Or is it just a meaningless but costly symbol that can be done away with?

Rose, who has been married for four years now, hardly ever notices the ring on her finger, except when admiring the look of it against a freshly done manicure.

But she would not give it up, even though it does not work quite as well as it used to, to get people to accord her the respect due to married women.

“The ring is such an integral part of me that it fades into my finger and becomes one with it. The only time I had to remove it was when I was pregnant two years ago and my swollen fingers made it uncomfortable to wear,” she says.

Single ladies also support the continuation of the tradition. Eleanor, a 25-year-old single nurse believes that wedding bands still have a place in society.

“How else can you identify and distinguish between the married and the unmarried if you take away the rings?” she poses.

But apart from identifying marital status, the ring seems to have lost its other “abilities”. Like how it used to stir respect for the boundaries of married people.

Women say that the ring that once earned them total respect as married women is no longer taken with the same solemnity of the past.

It used to be that a ring on the fourth finger of the left hand was a glaring sign that the wearer was unavailable.

It screamed at would-be suitors: I’m off the market - find someone else! But that effect seems to have waned off greatly.

No respect

Nancy, who will be celebrating her one-year wedding anniversary in four months, says that not every man respects the boundary created by her wedding ring.