Dating a married man

Temptation of the forbidden - Some people perceive married couples as the forbidden temptation since they are already committed and hence unavailable.

Interestingly, there’s an excitement that stems from the fact that such people are already taken, and attracting them gives the “hunter” a sense of power and accomplishment.

Furthermore, the challenge and the risk involved in conquering the prey makes the entire game even more exciting. It is no secret that most single women have an obsession for married men owing to the human trait of wanting what one cannot have.

On the other hand, some hunters go for one’s confidence, experience in intimate matters and authority. And even though it’s utterly unjustifiable and shameless, some people find a sense of accomplishment in bedding someone else’s man or woman.

This has a lot to do with the satisfaction that comes with breaking rules and doing things the wrong way without being caught. In other words, some people seek their sexual highs through cheating because of the excitement that comes with getting away with something taboo.

The need to win — Irrespective of the fact that today’s women are liberated, many still continue to perceive the married man as having a certain type of security. Cynical as it may sound, such women tend to think that married men will cater for their emotional needs better than any single man out there.

On the other hand, some women perceive having an affair with a married man as some sort of triumph over the wife. Although this signifies a lack of self-respect and self-worth, such women get a feeling of accomplishment and triumph over the legitimate woman.

This perception could not be further from the truth as it is obvious that the married man (trophy) is already taken. Unfortunately, such women get a non-existent feeling that they are extra special and better than the man’s legal wife. This again clearly shows that such women are only living in a fantasy world.

Additionally, some women go after the married man because they are dying to get what the legitimate woman has. In most cases, women do this maliciously to try and get back at the married man’s wife for reasons better known to them.

Security reasons — Although not in the least justifiable, some women claim to go for married men saying that they have all the qualities a woman would look for in a man.

On the other hand, many young men turn to married women for security reasons. It’s not surprising to find young men nowadays pursuing married women because they are financially stable.

Therefore, most hunters will pursue such people so that their financial needs may be taken care of. It’s no news that many young men out there are also dating older married women because their financial needs are being catered for by these women.

Sadly, such “gold diggers” prefer being kept by women who already have families as long as their material needs are fulfilled. The same goes for a lot of young women out there. Nowadays, many young girls have no qualms about dating married men as long as their rent is being paid and the cash is flowing.

It’s unfortunate that these are the reasons that contribute to the ruining of many marriages. Such women also need to keep in mind that anything immoral and short of unalloyed commitment between a man and a woman hardly ever lasts.

So next time you decide to date a married man for his money, think hard about whether it’s really worth it.

Has marriage lost its meaning? — There’s no denying that times have changed and most of us live in a culture that largely dismisses the significance of marriage.

This has led many young men and women to lose confidence in the idea of fidelity, believing that all people out there are incapable of being faithful.

A former Member of Parliament was recently quoted as saying that all married men have other women on the side. Although this caused a bit of a raucus with many men denying this allegation, there are those who agreed wholeheartedly with him.

Today, most young people out there expect very little, if any, faithfulness or loyalty from their partners. If a man cheats, then he was divinely engineered to do so. In essence, it would seem natural for a married man to cheat since “it’s what they do anyway.”

Then ask a woman why she is dating a married man and the immediate answer will have something to do with how many times she’s been betrayed by a younger, single man.

So, the fact that she has been a victim of infidelity in the past is her justification for dating a man who belongs to someone else. However, the unfortunate thing is that such anger and hatred is directed towards people who had nothing to do with whatever happened in the past.

Fear of the big “C” — We are all too aware that men have a fear of commitment and perceive serious relationships as a stumbling block to their much valued freedom. As a matter of fact, a lot of young men today will do anything to stay out of committed relationships.

Consequently, this has given way to open relationships, friendships with benefits and the like. It’s therefore no wonder that more and more young men are going after married women.
As many of them will blatantly put it, there is no concern for commitment when dealing with married women or obligations to fulfill conjugal rights.

Furthermore, the need for adventure and the married woman’s experience in bedroom matters makes her even more irresistible to a man who is running away from commitment.

But on the flip side, most modern women at the height of their careers do not want to be “tied down” by committing relationships either and choose to go for married men for the same reason.

Ignorance is bliss? — This applies to those who have no issues about cheating with a married person as long as their spouse does not get to find out. Such people live by the statement “what you don’t know won’t hurt you”.

In this case, the other man or woman feels that as long as nobody knows about the affair, then what they are doing is okay. More often than not, such affairs will continue until things blow and the affair is exposed.

Sadly, such exposures usually occur too late when the marriage in question is already on the rocks owing to the affair. Again, the idea of discretion should not be a justifying reason for young people chasing after married men or women.

No matter how private your affair with a married person may be, keep in mind that it is just as harmful to a marriage and there will be serious repercussions in the long run.

Think about it, who wants to date a home wrecker? Once the word goes around that you have the tendency to date married people, the negative image created will be far more damaging than any benefits you got from the affair...

For convenience — Meanwhile, some tight-fisted men go for married women claiming they don’t need spending on. So for this breed of men, the missus next door may just be his ideal choice.

While this should be frowned upon, others claim that married women are ideal seeing as they don’t demand for quality time or weekends out of town. All a married woman needs, they say, is an hour or so of stolen time and everything’s good.

Besides, this breed claims that married women are well trained by their husbands and have their bedroom techniques perfected. But on the other hand, some men dating married women claim that it is the women who lack confidence and come to them for reassurance.

They claim that such women are clinging to bad marriages, making them very easy to control as they have a low self-esteem. In a nutshell, such men are only there to take advantage of shaky marriages by presenting themselves as rescuers...