Are we our own worst enemy?

When Kingwa Kamencu announced her presidential bid last weekend, she cried.

For most of her potential voters, that was the ultimate deal breaker. And it was not just the men who were put off by her tears; the women too have been unforgiving.

Many saw her crying as proof that she was too womanly to be president, arguing that for a woman who was trying to get into a position of power, she was not hard enough.

She was seen as too tender-hearted and as a person who could not stand up in the brutal, male-dominated field of presidential aspirants.

One would have been mistaken to think that women all over Kenya would welcome the second woman (after Martha Karua) to announce her bid for the presidency with firm support, but they did not.

Instead, they joined in the criticism, terming her an embarrassment. Women have been said to be their own worst enemies in that they do not believe in themselves enough to run for political posts.

Yet when a woman announces her intentions to vie, her fellow women usually shower her with criticism.

Many women detest the bare-knuckle and sometimes violently aggressive campaigns that seem inevitable for anyone who wants to get ahead during elections.

They also shy away from the scrutiny and uncomfortable questions that are brought up about their personal lives on the campaign trail.

And in many cases, being a woman is usually enough persuasion to leave murky politics for those who are ‘men’.

For those like Martha Karua and Kingwa Kamencu who decide to run, there is criticism from all quarters to deal with.

Women who shared their views with Saturday Magazine after Ms Kamencu’s announcement gave her unfavourable ratings.

As a young unmarried woman, they questioned whether she would need to go on maternity leave, take a honeymoon break or deal with relationship problems if she ascended to the presidency.

Others argued that she should first get married and prove her ability to run a family, before she attempted to run a country.

Whenever we asked what women thought about supporting the youthful presidential candidate, they would laugh in jest and exclaim: That girl who cried on TV!

“She should toughen up first. Is she going to be crying every time she is confronted with a challenge,” poses Kinoo resident Eunice, who says she has never voted for a woman.

Eunice explains that the reason she does not vote for women is that they are rarely strong contenders compared to male candidates.

“I would hate to waste my vote on a woman who will not win the race. It is better to vote for the candidate who is most likely to win, and that candidate is usually a man,” she explains.

However, Eunice believes that in the coming years, a woman like Ms Kamencu might have a better chance. By then, she will have matured enough to understand Kenyan politics and toughened up.

Eunice adds that it was disappointing for women when Ms Kamencu broke down during a press conference to announce her presidential bid.

She says that was the one thing that lost her potential votes. “The reason why most of us cry in private is because men look for a way to use our emotional side against us. ''

Kamencu said she was upset about the long suffering of Kenyans, but it came across as unprofessional.

“The political environment is harsh. We need women who are strong enough to stand up to men and who will not break down over every crisis,” she stresses.

But Eunice agrees that perceived weakness aside, when a woman announces her candidacy for a political post, the first impulse by other women is to look for ways to discredit her rather than support her.

“Maybe we do not believe in the female candidates because we have never had a female president,” she says.

Wanjiru Muthoni, a 27-year-old law student, says she would like to see more youth and women run for political office, but she believes the thing that could be standing in the way of young women like Ms Kamencu is lack of resources and the power to mobilise funds.

“For a young woman, this is a long shot. Most of these male politicians have groups of people who oil their campaigns. I do not think many young women have the resources to finance a presidential campaign,” she says.

Wanjiru adds that women who enter political races have a lot going against them, the first being opposition from their fellow women, who have a deeply rooted culture of not supporting female candidates.

She boils it down to feelings of inferiority among women to the extent that they will not vote for another woman who they consider lesser than male candidates.

“Secondly, women are judged based on different standards. If, as a woman in a position of power, you blunder, you have spoiled it for all women.

“I think women can only vote for a woman who is hard-core. To be president, you have to be man enough and that is just the way it is.

''If you lower your guard as a woman, people will see you as weak. And weak women will not get any votes,” the aspiring lawyer says.

Njeri Wachira, from Thika, says that women should cut Ms Kamencu some slack, seeing as it is her first time to run for President of Kenya.

“I would give Kamencu a chance, but not now. However, we need to believe in ourselves as women.

“As any woman will tell you, it takes guts to go for the highest office. Few women have enough faith in themselves to vie for a local political seat let alone the presidency.

To make matters worse, we get jealous of women who think they have a shot and I think we are out to prove them wrong,” she explains.

Njeri, who says she has voted for female candidates before, wonders why women refuse to support fellow women, yet there are numerous examples of female leaders running companies successfully.

“That is proof enough that women can lead, and we should give them a chance to see what they can do,” she says.

Rebecca Mwicigi, a former aspirant for the Westlands constituency seat in 2007, says that for now, the younger women should give older women a chance to lead because it is only now that opportunities are opening up.

Rebecca, who has been involved in politics as a politician’s wife and a community leader through her church says that young women need to lay a foundation first on which they can run if they are to make successful bids in future.

“Of course mentorship is important, but if you are young and you know you want to vie for the presidency, lay out your groundwork first,” she advises.

Rebecca says that a young woman cannot come straight from school or from an office job and expect to sail through smoothly.

“You have to get involved in politics and work in the community to prove your skills if voters are to give you greater responsibility as a head of state,” she counsels.

All the same Mrs Mwicigi is convinced that this is a good time to vote for a woman president.

“It is time we gave a woman the green light. Men have had their chance. Let us now test and see what a woman can do,” she challenges.

Rebecca reckons that women have more empathy and hence a competent female president can deal with the pressing needs facing Kenyans.