Should I get back with my ex even after finding her in bed with a man?
When I paid her a surprise visit, I found her in bed with another man. She said nothing had happened but when I looked at her phone, I discovered that she had slept with two men already. We decided to give it another try since we have a son together. PHOTO | FILE
What you need to know:
- She said nothing had happened but when I looked at her phone, I discovered that she had slept with two men already. It felt like revenge best served cold.
- We decided to give it another try since we have a son together. I don’t know what to do; something tells me to let her be.
Hi Kitoto,
I have been under pressure from my mother to get married.
This led me to contact my former girlfriend, who had great qualities. This hurt my fiancée. I refused to bow down to my mother’s pressure to cut links with my former girlfriend, so we made up, despite her objection.
Sadly, when I paid her a surprise visit, I found her in bed with another man. She said nothing had happened but when I looked at her phone, I discovered that she had slept with two men already. It felt like revenge best served cold. We decided to give it another try since we have a son together.
I don’t know what to do; something tells me to let her be.
Please help.
Hi
I believe that we not only get what we ask for, but also what we allow others to dictate to us. Most in-laws, if allowed, can be as much a blessing to their married children as they can be a source of pain and frustration. Therefore, it is important to cultivate a relationship of mutual respect and love for each other.
In-laws should be valued, but at the same certain boundaries should be set to determine what is permissible, otherwise the demands that might be made by either side and the resultant intrusion can hurt more than be a blessing. Freedom and association must be allowed to dwell in harmony.
There is also the need to know when to say “no” to negative influence. Manipulation is possible where a son fails to take a stand against controlling parents. It is usually easier when one is dealing with their own parents on issues like this. You should not regret your decision concerning whom to marry.
Your girlfriend cannot excuse her behaviour. I can only assume that the situation with your mum was necessary for you to discover her real nature. It could also be that your rejection of her was a turning point. Whatever the case, one thing is clear: you have the right of choice. I do not know how genuine her repentance was and, therefore, cannot make any judgement.
Your desire for revenge is a sign of an inner anger or pain that needs to be dealt with.
