My HIV status does not invalidate my dreams

Doreen Moraa during the interview at Nation Centre. PHOTO/HUGHOLIN KIMARO

What you need to know:

  • Her mother fell ill when Doreen was 13, and went into a coma.

  • The near-death experience gave her mother the much needed impetus to muster the courage to tell her daughter the truth about her condition.

There is nothing about Doreen Moraa’s bright smile, firm handshake and confident demeanour that speaks anything about the tragic yet inspiring life story that she has.

Doreen was born 22 years ago to an HIV discordant couple. An HIV discordant couple is where one partner is HIV-positive and the other negative.

“I was born HIV-positive, where my mum is positive, my dad is negative and all my three siblings are negative as well. I am the third-born in a family of five, though we are four now because the fourth-born died due to Aids-related complications in 1999,” Doreen says.

BREATHING AND SKIN PROBLEMS

She was born healthy and had an idyllic childhood, but she started developing breathing and skin problems later.

“At the age of six years I was admitted to an ICU for two weeks and since then, I started suffering from one illness or another. I never knew whatever was wrong with me, though at some point my paternal relatives concluded that I was bewitched and suggested to my parents to slaughter a goat for the ancestors to intervene. I thank God it was never done,” she says.

She contracted herpes zoster when she was eight years old, which saw her admitted to Kenyatta National Hospital (KNH).

“I met some nuns from Nyumbani Children’s Home in Karen who, after I shared my story with them, sympathised and promised to offer me support. They said they would give me medication,” she says.

Doreen Moraa during the interview at Nation Centre. PHOTO|HUGHOLIN KIMARO

DOCTOR PROMISED ALL WOULD BE WELL

“My mum and I would travel all the way from Kisii to Nairobi to get the medication. My doctors had promised me that at the age of 12, I would get well by just growing out of the host of diseases that I was suffering from. I couldn't wait to turn 12. Little did I know that it would be another turning point in my life.”

Her mother fell ill when Doreen was 13, and went into a coma. The near-death experience gave her mother the much needed impetus to muster the courage to tell her daughter the truth about her condition.

“She was courageous enough to tell me that I was HIV-positive. Unfortunately, it was done without enough preparation as no counselling was done.

That was when and how I found out about my status. At first it didn't seem like it was going to be hard to cope with since I was already used to taking drugs. I was too young to understand the implication on my life,” she says.

LIFE IN SCHOOL

Life in secondary school was challenging, to say the least. She came up with lies to explain to her friends why she was taking so much medication.

“When I went to boarding school in Form Two2, in 2007, reality hit me very hard. My peers at the school wanted to know what the drugs I was taking were for. At some point I had to lie to them that they were for a heart condition that I had. They reluctantly accepted and life went on,” she recalls.

I WANTED TO BE AN AIR HOSTESS

"After completing high school challenge number two came. Choosing a career was another headache. I wanted to be a radio presenter or an air hostess. I realized with my condition I would never be an air hostess! I remember at one point a pilot friend of mine telling me that I could not be an air hostess because I was bound to fall ill anytime," she says.

Currently, Doreen is in college, at the Kenya Institute of Social Work and Community Development, and is about to graduate with a diploma in community development though still hoping to make her air hostess dream a reality and go against all odds.

She also works with the Teachers Service Commission’s Wellness Division, which deals with teachers living with HIV/Aids, offering psychosocial support and also helping teachers affected by alcohol and drug abuse.

GAVE UP MEDICATION

It has not been an easy journey for her. At one point in her life, she sunk into hopelessness and even stopped taking her medication because she felt that she was eventually bound to die anyway.

She managed to pull herself from her depression and learnt that the key thing is to live with hope and faith that no matter the stigma and rejection one faces things will be okay.

Doreen draws her support from her parents as they have been very supportive and never failed even once to provide her with the moral and financial support.

She also acknowledges her siblings for never giving up on her even after discovering that she was HIV-positive while they are negative.

She adds, “The sisters of Nyumbani Children’s Home and the doctors of KNH gave me hope to be what I am today. By them believing in me and constantly encouraging me that I was going to make it I remained strong.

I wish many more people would be that positive to the victims of HIV/Aids. This would prolong their lives in a big way.”

Doreen says sadly, “I have lost friends and even lovers due to my condition but I just want to encourage everyone out there especially young people that HIV is not a death sentence and the cure to HIV doesn't lie in some laboratory in America, China, Korea or Britain.

It lies in our hearts in the form of love, care and support for the people infected so that even when they feel down they know that they have people who love and accept them just the way they are. If you feel the need to contact me for more about my life feel free to contact me on[email protected].”