JUST BRENDA: My boyfriend is allergic to setting marriage goals

Hi Brenda,

My problem is that I can’t seem to get my boyfriend to set life goals together. I like setting my goals at the beginning of the year but he’s more

laissez-faire in his goals approach. One of the goals that I want us to set is marriage goals but he seems to always find excuses for not committing.

What’s wrong with him?

Hi,

He doesn't want to commit, which is why he doesn't want to talk about committing and life goals with you. A man who wants a future with you

knows this very quickly. A man who doesn't, unfortunately, communicates this very slowly.

It is the beginning of the year already. You are about to set brand new goals again. And I am sure none of these conversations have been had, right?

When a man wants to commit, he does.

It's as simple as that. If you've been together for multiple years (which it sounds like you have, as you have said you like to detail your year's goals and he doesn't...which means it has been at least a year or two?), these conversations are had within the first one, latest.

There's none of this wishy-washy subject avoidance nonsense, whether he is the goal-setting type or not. And surely, in this economy, how can he afford to not have goals?

He's mark timing with you until he finds someone he wants to marry and I guarantee that you will be ditched for her.

Maybe your New Year's resolution should be to love yourself in the absence of him. You know what you want, and I hate to break it to you, so does he. And it isn't you.

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