I am a big girl, and I love myself just the way I am

A graphic of a big girl.

What you need to know:

  • I am disgruntled by how society views the “big girl”.
  • I have been a big girl since birth — I was one in kindergarten and one throughout primary and secondary school.
  • Why is it so hard for society to look at a big girl and appreciate her as a person rather than the plump girl who must eat too much?

I am not one of those “phat” ladies who sit, complain, and give excuses about their weight issues.

However, I am disgruntled by how society views the “big girl”.

I have been a big girl since birth — I was one in kindergarten and one throughout primary and secondary school.

I have tried everything in an effort to deal with the weight — I have hit the gym, I have sipped on smoothies all day, and even though I once shrunk to a size 10, inside, I will always remain a big girl, a size 18.

Here is my beef: Why is it so hard for society to look at a big girl and appreciate her as a person rather than the plump girl who must eat too much?

The negative view people have of plus-size women is irritating, especially because it forces us to compete with the smaller sized girl.

We are told that small is more attractive, that small gets the man or the job which big will never get.

Pray tell, why should we be forced to feel the need to shed a few inches before the big interview?

BIG GIRLS ARE THE SAME AS EVERYONE ELSE

When a big girl gets unwell, her weight is to blame, when a big girl gets hungry, her weight is the cause.

When the big girl has menstrual cramps, she is advised to shed a few kilos to deal with pain that nature is to blame for.

When the big girl travels a long distance by bus and the feet swell, the weight is to blame.

Please enlighten me; who does not fall ill?

Who does not get hungry?

Whose feet do not swell after that long journey to Mombasa by bus?

People, let us give the big girl a break.

Putting her down, looking down at her, or making hasty judgments that chip away her self-esteem will not improve your life in any way.

If you didn’t know, overweight has various causes, some natural and some not.

The self-inflicted causes include poor eating habits and little physical activity.

GENETIC INFLUENCES

However, my emphasis is on genetic contribution to weight gain.

Studies have shown that genes have a strong influence on a person’s weight.

Obesity runs in families — if someone down the family line has been overweight, then you are likely to head there too.

Further, genes influence the amount of fat that your body is likely to store.

Hormonal problems also cause overweight, especially hypothyroidism, Cushing’s syndrome, as well as polycystic ovarian syndrome.

Studies show that the polycystic ovarian syndrome affects at least five to 10 per cent of women of child-bearing age.

Obviously, not all overweight people are to blame for their weight.

Some signs showing that one’s overweight is contributed by their genetic makeup include being overweight for much of your life, one or both of your parents or other blood relatives are significantly overweight, and being unable to lose weight even after increasing your physical activity and sticking to low calorie diet for months.

It is, therefore, good to ask yourself what happens when this big girl tries all weight loss programmes, diets, but still remains big.

It crushes her self-esteem, her confidence, and therefore her social life, especially if people direct mean remarks at her.

The big girl has become a target for cyber bullying and discrimination, though I must say that I am proud of some of these girls, who have managed to walk past the self-righteous judgment, head up, well groomed in their pencil skirts and six inch (well, four inch) heels.

Whatever body size you are, embrace your body and appreciate it.

The female body is beautiful and all women need to be proud of their bodies.

I may have a bit of cellulite, I might not be toned everywhere, I might struggle in this area or that, but accepting myself just the way I am empowers me to unimaginable levels.

By Stellah Riunguh
[email protected]