A life turned upside down

“One evening in December 2005, while waiting for a client at a city bar and restaurant, a man approached me and told me that Jesus loved me. I had never been religious. I had been a sex worker for seven years. I thought that Jesus was one of those white clients who liked to send other men out to the streets to get girls for them. Eager to be taken to this prospective rich client, I told him that I also loved Jesus.

“After buying me the drink and the cigarettes that I had demanded for my time, this man, who I later came to learn was a pastor, preached to me. When he left, I went back to looking for a client but something in me had changed. That was the first time I realised that there was a possibility of a different kind of life out here for me.

“Growing up, I was the middle child with a rebellious streak. My family lived in Ghetto area of Huruma Estate in Nairobi. My rebellion saw me drop out of school in Standard Five. This meant that I had all the time on my hands, which I spent with much older people. I started smoking cigarettes, which I soon upgraded to bhang.

“I was 16 when I first fell pregnant and promptly moved in with the father of my child. This relationship was shortlived and by the time I turned 20, I was all alone. I was inducted to the streets by a female friend. She told me that with a slim figure like the one I had, I could make thousands every night out in the streets. That first night, she taught me how to wear make-up, picked out a miniskirt for me and a flimsy top and showed me exactly where to stand on Koinange Street.

“This was the beginning of my seven years in the sex trade. I caught onto the trade fast. In a few short months, I knew all the clubs where I could meet potential customers. I learnt how to pick pockets and how to break into safes in the city hotels where I met clients. I knew which pastors could pray for a woman like me so that I could attract customers. I even went to a witchdoctor in Kawangware two times to see if he could turn my fortunes into marriage to a rich, white man, but he turned me away both times.

“I made a lot of money out there but I wasn’t living. I was drunk half the time. When I was sober, I was in a lot of pain. I carried with me a lot of anger at men because I felt my baby’s father had failed me.

“My mother had taken in my child as soon as I began sleeping out. With no sense of responsibility, I sunk even further down the rabbit hole.  I spent a month at the Lang’ata Women’s Prison after being convicted for loitering with intent to commit a crime, and I was in and out of police cells.

“My family tried to intervene many times, but I would hear none of it. I remember times when my mother would come for me in the cells carrying a leso for me to cover up my skimpy clothing. She would take me home and I would go right back to it the next day. Then I started losing friends in the street. I lost some to drug overdoses, botched abortions and attacks from clients. I can count at least 20 friends who died on the streets. Still, I kept at it.

REDEMPTION

“A few weeks after the restaurant encounter with a pastor, a well-known gangster I had been friendly with proposed marriage. While I knew who he was and what he did, he seemed like a better option than the streets, so I accepted his proposal and moved in with him. I was pregnant with my second child within a few weeks.

“Our marriage was turbulent. In the four years we were together, he was imprisoned twice. I was no longer going out into the streets but I was ferrying guns for him. Seeing where I was coming from, this seemed better. Then, he was shot dead in Dandora in 2009. This was when my life turned upside down.

“I tried getting a loan to start a business which went south. I lost all my household items. Feeding my two children became an uphill task. My desperation drove me to the point of considering taking their lives. I imagined that if I was alone, then it would be easier to fend for myself.

“One evening in 2012, I decided to go back to the streets – after all, I knew my way around. I found myself a client and went with him to his house. While there, I had an out-of-body experience that took me back to the conversation with that pastor at the restaurant seven years earlier.

“This was my turning point. I found refuge in the Springs of Living Water church in Pipeline, Nairobi, where I began my healing. Then I joined Life Bloom Services International where I underwent a mentorship programme. Slowly, I have rebuilt my relationship with my family.

Now, every day is an opportunity to change another young woman’s life. What I would like to do most is help other sex workers reform. Unfortunately, I haven’t come across many organisations with a similar agenda and I can’t do it alone.”