How to live your best life

Four women who’ve been  there, done that and found inner peace, on what it takes to live like them. PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP

What you need to know:

  • I am a mother of two; my first-born son is nearly 30 and my baby girl is eight.
  • My children bring me much joy. Having them so many years apart had its challenges as well as such enrichment.
  • I am enjoying the disparate stages of their lives.

Four beautiful women over the age of 40 talk to Saturday Magazine and about their approach to life and how it as contributed to their general wellbeing and good health.

Dr Rose Kogie-Henshall, 51, is a consultant physician in emergency and cosmetic medicine, and medical law. She works for the National Health Service, UK and owns the private clinics Dermakurve Clinic (UK) and NewYouNairobi Clinic (Kenya).

 

What do you love most about where you are at in life?

I am over 50 years old and proud of it. I decided to embrace wellness and enter a journey of transformation so that my life would take a confident and healthier course in my later years. It takes some hard work and discipline, but I believe it pays off. I hope to play netball with my grandchildren at 90, while still looking good for my age! It gives me great pleasure to share my journey of transformation with my patients, friends and family, and start a revolution for the fabulous looking and feeling 40s, 50s and beyond. I am married and move between two continents. I am a mother of two; my first-born son is nearly 30 and my baby girl is eight. My children bring me much joy. Having them so many years apart had its challenges as well as such enrichment. I am enjoying the disparate stages of their lives.

What is one thing you had to learn the hard way?

I suppose the obvious one is trust and forgiveness. I am a Christian and I learnt that forgiving each other and oneself is vital to enable us live in harmony with others and ourselves. It also gives way for true love for one another.

What are the most important things to you now? Why?

 I value close relationships most: they are the cushion on which we land in good and bad times. The most important of course is my very personal relationship with God, which is not defined by how many times I make it to service; He is always my constant.

My children bring warmth even when life feels like a storm. Then of course my husband, family and friends. Others things of value but in scarcity to many of us is time to stop and smell the roses, empty the mind of things best disposed of, and recharge and have a good laugh. Finally being in good health and being at ease with the way I look gives me confidence to tackle whatever comes my way. My most important goal is a long, healthy life.

How do you define ‘a good life’ or a ‘successful one’?

A good life to me is one where there is a healthy balance of all things. For example, great wealth at the expense of my relationships and health is self-defeating. I think that a life lived in harmony with yourself and others is a good life.

If you had the power to solve one problem in the world, what would it be and why? Please allow me three things because they are closely linked: poverty, disease and distributive injustices. We live in a society with a massive rich/poor gap; the disparity then follows in education, nutrition, health, appearance and confidence, social mobility and opportunities… the list goes on. If I had a magic wand, I would wish free access to health and education for every child up to 18 years. This would in some way redress the imbalance of distribution of wealth and opportunity, giving bright but poor children the chance to rise out of an otherwise predetermined path to mediocrity or poverty.

Life philosophy?

I believe that every human life counts, regardless of colour, creed or station. My second constant consideration is that every action or inaction has consequences, either immediately or later. I try to do good for the sake of it, and to live a balanced life. 

Advice to your younger self?

 I would say to seek first the tenets of Godliness and spiritualism and all good things will stem from these, such as positive choices for friendships, relationships, lifestyle, career.

 

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Carol Radull, 45, is a TV and radio sports presenter, and head of Bamba Sport Kenya.

What do you love most about where you are at in life?

I love the fact that I’ve made many mistakes and come through almost unscathed. It just means I’m wiser than I was when I was younger. And because of what I’ve been through in life, I choose my battles very carefully. I prefer to remain peaceful. I never believed a time would come when I wouldn’t battle with an unruly matatu driver just to teach him a lesson. I just let him go.

What is one thing you had to learn the hard way?

That while you think you have many friends, you actually don’t. I had to learn to differentiate between people I know and people who actually care about me.

What are the most important things to you now? Why?

Good health and keeping my family happy. Good health can never be taken for granted and I’ve lost many loved ones from diseases like cancer. It may sound cliché, but your health is indeed your wealth. If my family isn’t happy then I’m not happy, it’s that simple.

How do you define ‘a good life’ or a ‘successful one’?

Happiness. While it might sound fickle to say you need money to be happy; it certainly reduces stress when you don’t have to worry about how to put food on the table and a roof over your head. Too much money is overrated; just enough signifies a good life to me. And enough is relative. Some people need very little to be happy. But ultimately, happiness signifies success to me.

If you had the power to solve one problem in the world, what would it be and why? I wanted to say I would find a cure for cancer but that would resolve just one problem. I would miraculously resolve the problem of poor leadership because that sets the stage for everything else in life. Good leadership would bring good health care, jobs, good infrastructure, good education and everything else that we need to live that good and happy life.

Life philosophy?

Always aim to do good and be thankful. That way you bless others while God continues to bless us all.

Advice to your younger self?

Don’t complicate issues that are really pretty simple. And don’t fret the small stuff.

 

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Vickie Wanjiru Kihoro, 54, is a tours and travel business operator. She is married and a mother of three.

What do you love most about where you are at in life?

I have accomplished most of wanted I to… and I love that I am old enough now to say what is on my mind with confidence.

What is one thing you had to learn the hard way?

What I want in life depends entirely on me, with God’s help.

What are the most important things to you now?

Good health and a bed to lay my head on at the end of the day.

Why?

Everything else changes and even disappears

How do you define ‘a good life’?

One where you are able to solve your daily challenges each time they arise, and where I feel I have been able to achieve more than 70 per cent of my goals.

If you had the power to solve one problem in the world, what would it be, and why? Human greed. If we were not greedy, we would not have such a big gap between the haves and the have-nots and poverty would not be part of our lives.

Life philosophy?

Love your neighbours as yourself. Do not compare yourself with others. Never ever regret and definitely believe in God.

Advice to your younger self?

Life is seriously not a rehearsal. And God’s got your back.

 

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Liz Tapawa, 45, has been in the hospitality sales and marketing field for over 20 years. She is currently the group sales manager at Jacaranda Hotels Kenya.

What do you love most about where you are at in life?

I am most happy about this stage of my life because I get to see my kids turn into young adults.

What is one thing you had to learn the hard way?

Letting my mother go (may her soul rest is peace).

What are the most important things to you now? Why?

Time shared and making memories with my family and close friends is very precious. I know we are here a short while and I strive to make the best of this time. I also want to work till my hands can’t work anymore – hard work pays.

How do you define ‘a good life’ or a ‘successful one’?

A good life? When everything stops being about you and you start working for something greater than you. If you can make a difference in someone else’s life, then you have a good life.

If you had the power to solve one problem in the world, what would it be and why? I would want to see every child sheltered. It breaks my heart to see children on the street because they are homeless.

Life philosophy?

Manage your expectations of humans and live within your means.

Advice to your younger self?

Every mistake turned out to be a lesson, and life