PROPER SELF-EXPRESSION: How to communicate effectively

It pays to learn how to communicate with other people clearly and effectively. Carefully chosen words will smooth your way as you interact with others.PHOTO | FILE

What you need to know:

  • If you drink, you are well advised to learn to remain silent when you are drunk. The reasons for this are plenty. Firstly, you may find yourself becoming obnoxious and abusive.

It pays to learn how to communicate with other people clearly and effectively. Carefully chosen words will smooth your way as you interact with others.

The right words can heal rifts and open new doors. Aim to sound positive and upbeat as much as possible and you will be pleasantly surprised by the results. Here are some ways to communicate more effectively:

 

1. THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK

Let every word be well thought out so that you leave the person you are communicating with feeling positive. Do not blurt out sharp words in an argument, even when you are angry and irritated.

Take a deep breath whenever you feel the need to shout or argue so that you are in control of what you say. Many times, unfortunate words that can’t be taken back are uttered regrettably.

 

2. THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SEND LETTERS OR EMAILS

Once you put something in writing, you leave a permanent record of your feelings at that particular time. The tone of your message will linger in the reader’s mind, especially if it was an emotional missile.

Sometimes, people rush to lawyers to have them write letters of demand, or to issue warnings or threats. The scary tone of these letters is often enough to destroy relationships.

The same applies to text messages. Cool down before you send anything written so that you will sound emotionally balanced in whatever you write.

3.  DO NOT TALK WHEN DRUNK

If you drink, you are well advised to learn to remain silent when you are drunk. The reasons for this are plenty. Firstly, you may find yourself becoming obnoxious and abusive.

Many people get killed or injured during drunken exchanges, which are often as bad as they can get. Secondly, you could reveal things that should have been kept under wraps. Many are the times when people find themselves totally embarrassed when sober,

after realising that they sang like canaries while drunk. Thirdly, any speech conducted under the influence sometimes sounds foolish and irritating to sober people. The slurring and change of voice and accent may sound great to the speaker, but actually

sound awful to those in the vicinity.

 

4. CHOOSE WHAT YOU SAY TO WHOM

Everyone perceives things in their own way. For example, children are extremely sensitive to every spoken word. If you make a promise to them, they tend to remember it until it is fulfilled.

They take things literally until a certain age, and will repeat what they hear at some point. When you are talking to children, issue instructions and teach them what they need to know.

Remember the rule of speech: anything you say can, and will be used for or against you, therefore practise discernment.