The contraception conundrum

Although there are readily available contraceptives for men and women, it is often easily assumed that the woman should carry the burden of contraception in a relationship. Psychologist Patrick Musau says, “This is the reason why a man will deliberately avoid condoms during sex despite its availability, but hustle up and down to get his partner emergency pills.” Why is this? 

Adoption of contraceptives in relationships

According to Dr. Petra Boynton, a psychologist and author of The Research Companion, this is because some partners fear that initiating conversations about contraception in a relationship might be perceived as a passion killer. Similarly, many think that this conversation implies a lack of trust in the relationship.

According to a research study conducted by the Guttmacher Institute on the use of contraception at different stages of relationships, the timing and choice of method will strongly depend on the type of relationship. For instance, in the early stages of a relationship, many women will choose condom use.

“As the relationship progresses, many couples tend to abandon condoms and adopt traditional methods (such as the rhythm method). After a first birth, couples will prefer modern contraceptives to space children, but side effects often lead women to switch methods or discontinue,” says the research study.

Vasectomy

While this has remained an effective contraceptive method for men in relationships, myths surrounding it have made it unpopular. A vasectomy takes 15 to 30 minutes and will be 99.8 per cent effective. It does not affect sexual functioning or sexual pressure. But when men refuse to take a vasectomy procedure, women adopt riskier methods such as tubal ligation (surgical sealing of fallopian tubes).

Condom myths

Apart from being a protective sheath against sexual infections, condoms are also a form of contraception. However, in relationships, condoms tend to face a mountain of myths. For instance, a study conducted in 2004 on how men in Mombasa rationalised sex without contraception established that many men feel that condoms deny women sexual pleasure. They also feared that condoms caused pain due to friction.

Making the choice

Ultimately, you will need to make a decision on which method of contraception suits you. Be aware of all the available options – both hormonal and non-hormonal – and their risks and benefits. You should raise the red flag if your partner does not want to use any contraception methods at all.