Saturday, June 22, 2013

The Cutting Edge

By THE WATCHMAN

POWER ROW: Joining the raging debate on which of the two Houses of Parliament, the National Assembly and the Senate, should be scrapped, Sammy Njakai says it’s the former that should give way.

Doing away with Parliament, he adds, will not only end the relentless wrangling between the two, but it will also save the government the Sh2 billion to be spent annually on the MPs’ salaries.

“Why have a county like Nairobi represented by 10 members, yet the people are facing insecurity, water shortages, traffic congestion and other problems. One Senator can handle this.”

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NEGLECTED AREA: Nairobi South ‘C’ is a terribly neglected residential area, moans Salome Muhia, adding that there are no roads to speak of, all the way from Bandari Villas to Muhoho Road, and yet the people deserve such public amenities.

But Salome would like the new county leadership to confirm claims that money for road repairs was released, and yet the work has only been done in the South ‘B’ area. “We have no streetlights and there is dust everywhere, thanks to the almost impassable roads,” she yells. Her contact is [email protected]

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KIBAKI OFFICE: Since he first heard about the Sh700 million office plan for retired President Kibaki, Patrick G. Muya’s mathematical mind went into overdrive and this is what he came up with.

Says he: “If we spend Sh1 million a month to pay rent, staff salaries and for utilities and other expenses, it will take 700 months (58 years) to spend Sh700 million! Now, we want to levy Sh7 VAT on a Sh45 loaf of bread. We will need to tax 100 million loaves to pay for the office. That way, Vision 2030 goals will be achieved in the year 3030!”

His contact is [email protected]

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VAIN APPEAL: The appeal to the retired President to reject the offer to build the Sh700 million office for him is an exercise in futility, remarks William Apida. Before he left office last year, William recalls, “Kibaki signed into law a hefty retirement package for himself, but rejected a sendoff package Bill by the MPs”.

Following that decision, William adds, Kibaki’s former co-principal in the grand coalition, former Prime Minister Raila Odinga, and ex-Vice-President Kalonzo Musyoka “went back home empty-handed”.

His contact is [email protected].

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CORRUPT OFFICERS: Motorist Peter Omigo is not convinced that the police are honest or fair in their handling of drivers suspected of speeding. He believes the tickets liberally dished out to the suspects are mere bribe-inducing notes.

He poses: “Could they explain how they determine that a vehicle was speeding, as opposed to, say, accelerating to power the vehicle up a hill? Isn’t true that two speed-gun readings over a particular stretch of road are required to confirm that a driver was actually speeding?”

His contact is [email protected].

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STOLEN MIRRORS: The vandals who rip side mirrors and other items off cars in traffic jams in Nairobi are widening their net, it seems. Caroline Njuguna reports that while she was driving on Arboretum Drive in Nairobi, at 7am on Wednesday, “a man appeared from nowhere, plucked a side mirror off my car and disappeared towards the nearby river”.

The following day, she saw the same man in action at nearly the same spot. “With the frequent traffic jams on this road, more side mirrors are going to be stolen,” warns Caroline, whose contact is [email protected].

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GOOD SAMARITAN: During one of what he calls his rare visits to a cyber café in Nairobi, Alnashir D. Walji unknowingly dropped some money. On his return another day, the café owner asked him if he had lost any cash. And it turned out that a Good Samaritan had picked it up and given it to him.

After the interrogation, the money in hard currency, amounting to Sh600, was handed over to him. “How I wish all were of the same ilk! The Bible says that ‘to all intents be true to thyself’.”

His contact is [email protected]

Have an honest day, won’t you!

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