Last year, Saturday Nation columnist Njoki Chege wrote an article about women who smoke shisha.
It was brought to my attention because of #KOT and this particular line: "All you need is to buy her a pot of shisha and await her blackout, drag her to your car’s backseat and she is all yours."
Granted, there were a lot of things I did not care for in the article, but I feel this one crossed the line in a particularly insensitive and abundantly hurtful manner.
And it would seem that people did not pay as much attention as was warranted, to this line.
Let me make this clear: that line in Chege's article encourages rape, and that is why I was so deeply offended by it.
It read like she was sharing a formula for sexual assault: all you have to do is wait for a woman to black out, and then it is ok to drag her into your car and rape her, basically. Class dismissed.
And this is how sexual assault happens, often.
Obviously, the writer has never heard of consent, or the fact that people don't really black out from shisha.
For those of you who are not aware, a woman drinking with you, is not consent. A woman smoking with you, is not consent. A woman coming into your house, is not consent. Consent is a conversation. Not a gesture, not an action. Consent is an explicit declaration when a woman says, "Yes, I want to do this."
Let's not victim-shame and say she should not have been there in the first place. Approximately 75 per cent of rapes are inflicted by someone the victim knows.
So she should not have been with her friend? Or what? Or are we assuming that all women who are raped are at a club drinking heavily and get what's coming to them? Because that is bullshit.
If you read Chege's article, she is supposedly describing a particular type of girl who smokes shisha. But no type of girl, "loose" or not, "amoral" or not, "deserves" to be raped.
A woman who has blacked out cannot give consent. That line is enthusiastically perpetuating the rape culture that so many of us already have to deal with.
It just made it worse.
Unfortunately, women can be our own worst enemies. The Bill Cosby sexual assault cases, for example, continue to convolute, and even after he confessed to giving women drugs and sexually assaulting them, women are still saying he can't have done it.
When a woman "sleeps" with 40 men, she is called a whore. When a man sleeps with over 40 women over a period of 4 decades and they come forward to say they were coerced, it is called a conspiracy against a "pillar of the black community".
These double standards are a problem. These rape enthusiasts are a problem. And we should call it out.
Don't be fooled by agendas to blind you or degrade "the scum of womenfolk". It is what it is; no one should be allowed to rape a woman, especially an incoherent or inebriated one.