Diary of a poultry farmer: Oops! Another tragedy strikes

As an ardent reader, you probably know by now that I don’t start this column with a quote from a remarkable person.

But today, I’ll make an exception. Who said these words? “When you’re running a business, things will go wrong all the time.” a) Bill Gates; b) Mark Zuckerberg c) Richard Branson d) Yours Truly. I’ll get to the answer later.

Over time, I have learnt that readers normally enjoy stories about every day experiences on the farm. There is a time I've shared tragic experiences that were stranger-than-fiction.

In such instances, I’m never sure whether you laugh at me or you empathise with my situation.

You probably recall the time when my loyal dog mauled 130 hens that had just started laying eggs (Seeds of Gold, November 18, 2017).

This set me back six months, as once again, I went to Kalro in Naivasha to buy a new batch of day-old-chicks to re-build my stock.

There was also this instance when I was arrested by the police and grilled for two hours for using my personal car to ferry goods (Seeds of Gold, January 21, 2017). They later let me off the hook.  

Another remarkable incident happened when some men wielding guns pulled into my farm and threatened to carry away my chickens.

Later, I learnt they had a beef to settle with the worker for reasons I’ve never quite come to know. I had to let him go.  

Two weeks ago, at about nine o’clock on a Saturday, I got a call from Okello, my farm manager. I normally encourage my workers to text me instead of calling.

This is because it’s cheaper and sometimes I can be busy (texting is also a way to circumvent any discussion on salary advance requests).

As such, whenever they call, I’ve always assumed dire consequences. This was the case when Okello called that morning. 

WEIRD FEATURES

“You need to get a mason quickly,” he rattled over the phone. “The entire roof of the chicken pen next to the dog’s kernel has been knocked to the ground.”  

After establishing that no one had been hurt, I focused on the nitty-gritty.  

He explained how a lofty whirlwind smashed through the metal gate flinging it wide open. It then swirled through the parking corridor, made a turn to the left and slammed right into the roof of the chicken pen in the middle, ripping it off and hurling iron sheets and timber into the neighbour’s plot.

The scene resembled the aftermath of a mini- hurricane disaster. 

I immediately asked the mason, Kilonzo, to visit and assess the damage. The total bill came to Sh12,082. Because the chickens could not withstand the excess heat from the open roof, the repair work had to start right away. By 5pm, Okello texted to inform me that the work had been completed.  

Now, there’s a twist to the story and its good news. You probably remember that sometime in November last year, I introduced some chickens with ‘weird’ features on my farm in Njiru (Seeds of Gold, December 2, 2017; December 23, 2017).

Some village folks had vehemently dissuaded me from rearing these birds because of superstitions associating them with a bad omen. They started laying eggs just a day before the whirlwind landed. I’m now on course to meet customer orders for frizzles and naked-necked chickens.   

Now, back to my quiz. If you answered (d), you’re probably giving me more credit than I deserve.

This quote came from an article I read by Richard Branson, the founder of the Virgin Group of companies. Every time such misfortunes arise, I ask myself this question, “What will happen next?”