Electina and Honda must go back to their parents!

As you all know, late last year, Fiolina, the laugh of my envious life, brought two of her nieces, Electina and Hinda, to stay with us.

These two are the daughters of Tocla, my brother in law, a man who is always at Hitler’s when he has money and when he doesn’t have money.

I had thought the girls would return to their home after Christmas, but that was not the case. If anything, they were enrolled at Mwisho wa Lami Primary, School, where I serve as the deputy headmaster, and de facto headmaster. I at first protested this decision, but Fiolina convinced me.

RESPONSIBLE

‘We stay with Branton whose father we do not know. What’s the problem with staying with two girls whose father we already know, I consoled myself. I therefore accepted the two girls as my daughters, and I treat them as such. The girls have been good, responsible and respectful.

Until last Friday. As you know, three weeks ago, together with Fiolina, we launched Drelina Mini-bakeries, our investment arm that we hope will make us some good money during and after this corona thing. The business is fairly successful, by Mwisho wa Lami standards, mainly due to our structure that is fit for purpose.

I serve as the chief executive and chief forwarding officer as well as director, commercial; meaning that I handle all financial matters as well as overall running of the enterprise. Fiolina is the chief operating officer, her main role being to ensure that Branton and I have something to take to the market on time, every day. This has been going on well but the two girls we allowed in our home, are now causing some problems.

Last week they asked to talk to me. Alone. It is not the first time they have asked to talk to me alone. You see, Fiolina is very harsh especially to them. So, a few times they have talked to me to talk to her.

But this time it was different. They were afraid to speak, as if they had been sent. And ten minutes after we met, when Fiolina had left to go visit my colleague Lena, her bad hair notwithstanding, they had not said anything specific.

Electina talked finally. “Thank you for starting the mandazi and chapati business,” she said. “It keeps us busy.”

DRAWING CIRCLES

“Especially Branton,” added Honda. “He used to do nothing, excepting eating.”

“Thank you very much for your support,” I said. “Mwisho wa Lami people really enjoy the mandazi you cook. They are so sweet.”

“Congratulations!” responded Electina. I would have responded so as well. Electina kept drawing circles on the ground, in a manner to suggest that she wanted to say something but couldn’t say it. She finally spoke.

“As the chief chef, we were wondering if we could be paid something however small,” she started. “To just say thank you.”

I was fuming but I managed to control myself. So, I asked them what they wanted to do with the money.

“To buy some clothes,” said Electina.

“To go buy mandazi,” she said. “At the market.” Yes, Honda wanted to be paid for cooking mandazi and use the money to go buy some mandazi from somewhere else!

I decided to play along and asked them how much they wanted to be given. Instead of asking to be given a token of appreciation, they wanted daily payment based on how many they cooked. I did not need a calculator to know that was the work of Fiolina. She had been asking me for money everyday. She thought I was making millions from our little venture and kept pestering me. She was now using the girls.

And indeed, I was not surprised when she arrived and immediately called the girls to talk to them, ostensibly to find out what I had said. That evening, I gave her a piece of my mind. I told her that the business wasn’t making as much money as she thought, and when things stabilise, I will reward her handsomely, but not the girls.

POUR WATER

“I think we need to pay them,” she said. I told her start that I would not pay them, unless their father refunds me what I spend on their upkeep, and fees.

Yesterday morning, I woke up at 7am as usual, ready to pick the mandazi and start distributing. I went to wake up Branton. Branton has never woken up on time, and waking him up is a lot of work. You must literally shake him, and sometime pour water on him.

Just then, Electina and Honda appeared from their bedroom to the kitchen, they were still sleepy. Nothing had been prepared. I was mad at them and asked why.

“Sorry we over-slept,” said Electina. I asked how long it would take for mandazis to be ready. She said it would take long since they had forgotten to knead the flour the day before.

“May be 10 a.m.” she said meekly.

“That is too late, we have customers waiting at 8.00 am. This is business and we need to be serious.” I was shouting and this attracted Fiolina who came to their defense.

“Kelele ni ya nini asubuhi?” she asked.

I kept quiet since I did not want to argue with her.  And I would have lost the argument anyway. But she dug in.

There and then, I made a decision. Electina and Honda would have to return to their parents. I have been generous enough. And I will execute that plan today!