Alarm as more Kenyan youth turn to self-harm

To tell if your child is engaging in self-harm, look out for wounds with cut patterns around the wrists, arms, fists and forearms opposite the dominant hand. PHOTO| FILE | NATION

Dear parents, it would probably shock you if I told you that your teenager cuts herself.

Although self-harm is not widely reported in Kenya, therapists who work with adolescents are seeing more and more cases of self-injury.

Every day, I read emails and text messages from your sons, and receive calls from your distraught daughters. They have aggressive scratches, burns, and punches, all self-inflicted.

Self-harm (or non-suicidal self-injury) is deliberate, self-inflicted injury without a suicide attempt. The injuries are minor, moderate or severe.

Sometimes self-harm can be lethal, leading to suicide attempts or death by suicide.

Adolescents who harm themselves may not be suicidal, but they are at greater risk of attempting suicide or dying by suicide. Non-fatal self-harm is more common in girls. For boys, being bullied and problems with school work increase risk of self-harm, while for girls, having low self-esteem may lead to self-injurious behaviour.

Why do they do it? Many have a history of abuse (especially sexual abuse), trauma or neglect.

Borderline personality disorder, anxiety disorder, eating disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder, substance abuse, high levels of impulsivity and self-harm by friends or family members also predispose adolescents to self-harm.

Some are not able to regulate their emotions, and most are trying to express their psychological pain or reduce their distress through self-injury.

URGE TO END IT ALL

You may wonder why your child would put herself or himself through pain to reduce pain.

Here’s how it works: When they self-harm, they are taking their focus from the distressing anxiety and the compelling urge to end it all. The pain from self-injury makes them feel like they have some life left in the midst of the numbness they feel inside. Sometimes they are punishing themselves for something, or they do something as “drastic” as injuring themselves as a cry for help. They need someone to pay attention to what’s going on and help them out of it.

Not surprisingly, you may not have noticed that your son or daughter harms himself or herself, because they do it secretly.

They do it compulsively and repetitively and the location of the injuries can tell you secrets your child has not expressed – injuries inflicted on the face, eyes, neck, or breasts indicate greater psychological disturbance than injuries on other parts of the body.

They should be taken seriously because they indicate that your child might have other concurrent mental disorders that need to be addressed.

If there are no interventions, self-harm can go on for years – lasting one to five years on average. It starts at around age 13, peaks, and then reduces by late adolescence or early adulthood (after age 17).

WHAT TO LOOK OUT FOR

To tell if your child is engaging in self-harm, look out for wounds with cut patterns around the arms, wrists, fists and forearms opposite the dominant hand.

Frequent bandages and having blades and needles or other odd paraphernalia could also be red flags.

If your child is inappropriately dressed for the season (for example, long sleeves and covering up in warm weather when everyone else is dressing down to cool off), that’s a red flag. The same applies if your child is unwilling to participate in activities that require less body coverage.

If you discover that your child self-harms, there is help available. Psychotherapy is effective in treating self-injury.

Therapies such as dialectical behavioural therapy, problem-solving therapy and cognitive behavioural therapy are also recommended. And if there are concurrent mental disorders, they should also be addressed.

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Mr Chomba is the lead therapist at Befrienders Kenya, an organisation that offers free listening and counselling services to adolescent, youth and adult Kenyans in distress