How to be a glamorous woman

Actress Lupita Nyong'o.

YouTube and Instagram have played a critical role in redefining glamour - social media and celebrity culture have made it democratic by highlighting aspirational lifestyles that have influenced fashion and beauty standards

Some words are worth a thousand pictures. They can be enigmatic and vague, yet mean 1001 little things. Take glamourous. Glamourous, that state of possessing glamour, refers to someone – let’s work with a woman – who has this air of sophistication, elegance, charm, and allure.

A captivating quality or appearance resulting from her refined style, charismatic presence, and polished demeanour.

Glamour is derived from the Scottish word "gramarye," which refers to magic or enchantment. In fact, originally, glamour was associated with mystical allure and fascination, often linked to spells or illusions. Its meaning has since evolved. While some content lays glamour at the feet of Europe, others go as far back, naturally, as Egyptian, and Greek civilisation.

Back in a time, a luxurious, divine mien added allure to one’s appearance. Curiously, glamour is specifically the result of middle-class FOMO (fear of missing out). Rich people have always been able to afford nice things.

Over time, poor people found ways to elevate their social status, and when they made money, they wanted things they could not or did not have. Ergo, the middle class was born. When this class of newly minted rich people went shopping, it was said they wanted what the rich had. Just, more. They decided to spice up the trappings of wealth with a touch of something extra.

This combination of ‘new’ money, luxury, and an overt dash of spice dates pre-dates the Kardashians, going as far back as the mid-1800s. Curiously, heightened glamour runs parallel to the current old money craze, making the latter look almost bland. The colours of old money are expressed as muted, the cut of the cloth minimalist, and it is all meant to give the impression that one has inherited money rather than worked for it.

The old money aesthetic aka ‘quiet luxury’ is enjoying a fierce moment on TikTok and all the rage in the femininity movement circles, picking up steam with black women. On the other hand, rich people do not necessarily want to dress like they walked off the set of Succession.

The emergence of Hollywood in the 20th century influenced modern perceptions of glamour. Silver screen icons redefined elegance, setting new standards for style and allure by amplifying their look.

Shiny styled hair, photography settings that bestowed them with an otherworldly glow, make-up that borrowed a leaf from reality then sprinkled it with muchness to an image that was inevitably red carpet ready added up, creating this ‘vibe’ that could only be described with a new word that wrapped it all up as glamorous.

Being glamorous was, and still is, a constellation of attributes: confidence, grace, and self-assuredness that makes a woman magnetic, an impeccable albeit uniquely personal sense of style and fashion, grooming, having a presence, possessing individuality, right down to having poise under fire or in the face of adversity all showcase glamour.

YouTube and Instagram in particular, have played a critical role in redefining glamour. Social media and celebrity culture have made it democratic by highlighting aspirational lifestyles that have influenced fashion and beauty standards.

This is a bit of a double-edged sword though. Glamour is now far more inclusive, celebrating diversity and individuality. At the same time, there is pressure to maintain elegance. Glamorous women can also suffer the fate of not being taken seriously, accused of frivolity, and objectified.

Keeping all this in mind, is being glamorous worth aspiring to?

The history of glamour shows just how dynamic glamour can be. It is influenced by our own interpretations, society’s understanding of it and art. It is also shaped by the magic of sprezzatura; the art of being effortless. Being glamorous does require effort, but the most glamorous women are, paradoxically, the ones who make it look easy! Here’s how to be one of those women.

- Confidence is the key to glamour and is embracing one’s uniqueness, practising self-care and the reward of the very involved task of knowing thyself.

- You will need to develop a personal style. Something that reflects your personality. Do not hesitate to experiment with fashion, learn what suits you best, and create a signature look.

- Grooming is queen. You must maintain good personal hygiene, work at keeping your appearance polished, and pay attention to details like hair, skincare, and well-maintained nails. I told you there was effort involved.

- Etiquette and polish count for a lot. This goes beyond knowing which knife and fork to use. Having good manners, good posture and cultivating wit make you stand out.

- Be confident with your individuality. I must point out that this is the crux of it all. Few people embrace their uniqueness or even celebrate their individuality. There are instances where being a non-conformist pays off. This is one of those. Discover and engage your distinctive qualities. Authentically. Don’t be fake.

- Observe glamourous women. Let them be your teachers. But do not go forth blindly. If I had a dollar for every Caucasian woman who wanted to be Marilyn Monroe … learn from their style, mannerisms, and confidence and then use that as inspiration. Do not copy-paste. I beg you. Refine your own iteration of distinct glamour. March to your beat.

- Embrace progress and continuous growth. I do hate to be a cliché, but being glamorous is not a destination. It is the journey.

- You know how people keep describing the way a woman carries herself? Well, they have a point. Carry yourself with poise. That means being cool, calm, and collected. I repeat, do not be rachet.

- Have an eye for detail. A glamorous woman pays attention to the little things that add up to a bigger picture when it comes to overall presentation. This includes thoughtful accessorising, clothing choice and appreciating the complete package that is her look.

- Handle yourself well. Being glamorous extends beyond your physical appearance. Remember that pointer about continuous growth? Be adaptable and handle challenges with grace and composure.