Trouble with engine issues

How come parts that break when you are on safari are always the most difficult to get at with a standard set of tools?

Your car comes to a halt. Open up the bonnet and there before you are 100 items that are easy to see, easy to reach, and can be managed with basic spanners; open-ended, ring, ring-offset or socket; screwdrivers of ordinary length and strength; standard pliers, etc. And they can be attended to without acquiring third-degree burns.

But you can be certain that all those bits will be okay. The part that’s caused the breakdown will be behind and under other things, in dark and scorching hot places, accessible only to people who are left-handed, double-jointed, and in possession of a wrench with an s-shaped handle and an especially short socket on an asymmetrically reversible knuckle joint.

Is this just Sod’s Law, or a conspiracy between vehicle designers and workshops to ensure competent amateurs don’t do them out of a part sale or a repair job? By definition, Sod’s Law applies. It always does in any situation. That’s its mission. A conspiracy, too, between parts sellers and professional fixers. That’s their business.

But neither of these factors is the main reason.

The plain fact is that the parts you can see and reach easily are those most likely to be checked and serviced by your garage. The bits that require a contortionist and specialist tools are the bits they neglect or cross-thread or don’t tighten or overtighten or don’t clean or lubricate or adjust properly. And that’s why they go wrong when you’re on safari.

Far be it from me to suggest that garages deliberately “fault” the cars they fix. But there is an extraordinary weight of evidence to suggest that the part most likely to break is the one that has just been repaired, or one that is out of sight and therefore out of mind in routine service.

That certainly doesn’t indicate craftsmanship, but in most cases it doesn’t stem from craftiness, either. It is a standards-and-competence issue.

On the positive side, this syndrome illustrates the importance of good service.

Parts that are regularly and properly maintained and checked and adjusted tend not to fail in mid-journey. Breakdowns almost always stem from neglect.

Service that delivers higher standards of skill and diligence also involves higher cost. But being able to afford that quality is a lot less difficult than finding it!

On the less positive side, workshops with skilled mechanics and disciplined systems are not abundant. Most are like the plumber who recently installed a rainwater tank at the side of my house. Simple: a concrete base, a tank, a gutter to guide the rainwater in, a tap to let the water out, and an overflow spout.

When he reported the work complete and asked for payment, I checked the job and the tank was leaking. The fundi was aghast at my reluctance to pay in full and immediately.

“After all,” he said, “there is only one leak.”