JUST BRENDA: I am sick of people telling me to get married, get a baby

Thursday November 22 2018

People keep talking about my biological clock and urging me to get married. PHOTO | FILE | NATION MEDIA GROUP


Hello Brenda,

I’m 40, and I am not married. People keep talking about my biological clock and all.

They keep telling me to just get anyone and not care about values because I am old and should be married; or I should just get pregnant with anyone if I don’t want to get married.

I am sick and tired of all this.




You need new friends. How dare they say get anyone?

Do they think there is some sort of catalogue where you can go and pick out someone appropriate? Do they know how hard it is to date, without the extra judgement of friends saying silly things like just get anyone and get pregnant because you're old?

In case no one has told you, for the record, that's bullshit. You can't just get married to anyone. Marriage is hard enough as it is without doing it for the sake of doing it – just like having a baby is hard enough if you're just doing it to check off a box. Don't give in – not unless you want to. And that's another conversation to have with yourself.

If you don't want it, don't do it. And get new friends. Also, the next time someone says you should marry someone, anyone, ask them if they raised a man for you to marry. If not, they can keep their opinions to themselves (unless it's an older person, in which case smile respectfully as if you haven't heard anything they've said and walk away quickly).


Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: [email protected]