JUST BRENDA: I have a girlfriend, but I'm falling for my prayer partner

Hi Brenda,

I normally attend mass each morning before heading to work. There is this lady who normally sits beside me. She is young (possibly in her early 20s), beautiful, always well-dressed and I guess she has a good job.

Previously, I attended mass purely for my spiritual well-being as I am a staunch Catholic.

But I started developing feelings for this lady, and nowadays I go to church expecting to see her. If she does not turn up, I feel really bad.

I don't know her name and neither does she know mine because we have never talked at length, save for the usual greetings and ‘how is work?’ conversations.

I have caught her staring at me a few times, but I brushed the idea of her feeling the same way as mere imaginations in my head.

However, on Friday after mass, she invited me to attend the 10am mass at her church on Sunday. I don't want church to be the cause of my sinning because I already have a girlfriend. What should I do?

You're absolutely right, church should not be the location for your sinning, but the place you come to learn to do better.

Of course, temptations will not stop at the church door, but now that you know that you have feelings for this woman and you know you have a girl-friend, every action from here on will either redeem you, or damn you.

Have you tried sitting in a different pew, perhaps? Or coming to mass after work instead of before? And surely your feelings have no basis upon which to stand on.

If you have never had any deep conversation past how is work and how are you, then clearly this is just an infatuation that will quickly go away, hopefully. Either wait it out or move pews.

***

Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? E-mail: [email protected]