JUST BRENDA: My high school sweetheart no longer wants me

We do bump into each other but none of us says hi. We don't talk anymore. PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP

What you need to know:

  • Sometimes in relationships, we see only what we want to see, instead of understanding that we are actually single.
  • Maybe the supposed prestige of having a college boyfriend was not enough for her as soon as she got into campus.
  • Do you have a problem to share with Just Brenda? Please email: [email protected]

Hallo Brenda,

I’m a 21-year-old university student here in Kenya. When I joined college, I had a girlfriend who was in Form Four. I used to encourage this girl and I respected her for the four years we'd known each other. We never slept together for we knew it was too early for us. Immediately she finished her KCSE, she stopped talking to me. To make matters worse, she joined the same university I was admitted to. She's one year behind me and we do bump into each other but none of us says hi. We don't talk anymore. I love her to date but we’re no longer together and whenever we meet, I feel like there's no life ahead. What can I do to make life better for me because I don't really understand what to do with all stress of being dumped. Please help.

 

Hi,

I am sorry that this girl betrayed your trust. Was there any indication that she was losing interest in you that you could see? Is it possible that you are the only one who thought you were in a relationship when in reality, you were the only one being faithful? Sometimes in relationships, we see only what we want to see, instead of understanding that we are actually single. Maybe the supposed prestige of having a college boyfriend was not enough for her as soon as she got into campus. Meanwhile, this girl has moved on with her life, and so, you must move on with yours. It is ok to mourn and be sad, and it is perfectly normal. Most people feel like they are going to die after breakups. That's why it is called a heartbreak, not a 'heartjoy'. Eventually, this feeling will pass, and hopefully you will be able to find something real after it, after having learnt that not everything is always as it seems. Don't jeopardize your professional future for someone who clearly doesn't care about you.