JUST BRENDA: My husband cheats on me with neighbours and house helps

I have sent away house helps because he keeps falling for them.

My husband falls for almost anything in a skirt. I have even moved houses before, to different areas, out of shame. PHOTO | FOTOSEARCH 

IN SUMMARY

  • It doesn't have to be death that does you part; it could be the super gonorrhoea that's going around that you're probably going to get.
  • If you are not exhausted with the worry of thinking who he could be with at any given time, then there's nothing I can tell you.
  • Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com

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Hi Brenda,

I am a worried woman. My husband falls for almost anything in a skirt. It is so bad in the estate we live in. I have even moved houses before, to different areas, out of shame. But he doesn’t stop.

But the worst is philandering in our house! I have sent away house helps because he keeps falling for them. Some sleep with him, while others tell me or tell neighbours to tell me about his behaviour. It is really annoying and I am fed up with his behaviour. Kindly advise.

I wanted to start by asking if you're going to put up with this kind of behaviour or leave, but I feel like you've chosen the latter.

You see, the problem with marriage is that, for all intents and purposes, people intend it to be permanent – that whole oh, till death do us part, spiel. But it doesn't have to be death that does you part. It could be the super gonorrhoea that's going around that you're probably going to get, even after you've moved houses three times.

If you're not tired of your househelps sleeping with your man and won't leave by yourself, then there's no point of you writing in, because you've chosen the former of the choices listed above.

If you are not exhausted with the worry of thinking who he could be with at any given time, with any given person you see on the street, around the hood, at the office, then there's nothing I can tell you.

I would say suggest counselling to him, and if he refuses, leave. Who told you you must die in that marriage? No.

Even the Bible (if you're that kind of girl, which most Kenyans claim they are) allows divorce in the instance of unfaithfulness. In the words of Wyre – make a choice, baby girl. Make a choice.

***

Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: lifeandstyle@ke.nationmedia.com

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