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JUST BRENDA: She insists I pay her bills

Sunday October 14 2018

She  insists I pay her bills including rent, food and clothing, but I am not in a position to do so.

She insists I pay her bills including rent, food and clothing, but I am not in a position to do so. PHOTO | FOTOSEARCH 

JUST BRENDA
By JUST BRENDA
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Hi Brenda,

I have been in a relationship with this girl for nine months now—I am six years older than her. I own a business and it has not been doing well of late, in fact, I have some debts and unpaid bills. Recently, my girlfriend went back to college as a self-sponsored student. With her added school expenses, she is unable to cater for her personal expenses.

She now insists I pay her bills including rent, food and clothing, but I am not in a position to do so. She claims that I have neglected her and that she is better off on her own. She wants us to call it quits despite the fact that we had plans to marry. Please advise

Hi,

Your girlfriend is suffering from major stroke of self-entitlement that I am having a hard time wrapping my head around.

Just to be clear – unless you are her father, you have no obligation to meet her needs whatsoever, if there was no previous agreement detailing such. Before she went back to school, did she mention that you would eventually be responsible for her bills if she could not pull through? If not, then she's being ridiculous.

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It is one thing to help your partner when they are financially strapped. It is another thing to insist that they pay bills they never agreed to in the first place or at least after a semblance of a discussion.

And what is this she is better off alone business? News flash, sir, you are better off alone. Anyone who immediately offers a break up at the first sign that their ransom demands are not being met should be kicked to the curb.

She is dangling an emotionally manipulative red flag right in front of you – if you don't pay for my stuff, we are over. Is the relationship this flimsy?

You are financially strapped as well. She was not in your budget. And if you marry this girl, her lack of understanding, comprehension, empathy and consideration will continue to plague you well into your nuptials. Dump this unrealistic deluded woman.

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Do you have a problem to share with Brenda? Please email: [email protected]

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