JUST BRENDA: He cheated on me but I want him back

Hi Brenda,

My husband cheated on me some time back. When I found out, I threw him out of our house. He later apologised and for months, he has been trying to make it up to me. I still love him and I want him back home. We have discussed some things and I have told him my conditions, including couples counselling. He has been taking the children on weekends to visit for the time we have been apart.

The truth is, he’s a great father and had always been a great husband until he cheated. My friends say that if he cheated once, he could cheat again.

What do you think? I want what’s best for my family but also what’s best for me.

Your friends are right. If he cheated once, he can definitely cheat again. But you see, this is the thing. Your friends can have opinions on how you should leave or stay with your husband, but you're the one who is going to have to stay with the man.

They can talk all they want, but only you know if you believe him, and only you know if you can stay with him. Think about this.

If he cheats again, will you leave? Can you handle that? How important is fidelity to you? Weigh out your priorities and figure out what you want. The truth of the matter is – some people don't mind cheating spouses, and would rather someone who is a good husband, according to them, and a good father. And the fact that you are asking me this makes me think that you don't mind as much as your friends do. If it's a deal-breaker for you, then so be it. But if not...

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