JUST BRENDA: How do I deal with silent treatment from my 'one night stand'?

Tuesday March 13 2018

I am 23 years old and I have been in love with this girl since she was in her early teens. We Do you actually like the guy and you're telling yourself that you don't, and so the 'one night stand' was a way to get your foot in the door?  PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP

I am 23 years old and I have been in love with this girl since she was in her early teens. We Do you actually like the guy and you're telling yourself that you don't, and so the 'one night stand' was a way to get your foot in the door?  PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP 

By JUST BRENDA
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Hi Brenda,

I had a one night stand with a guy that I was not really that into and I was not really planning to contact him again but one thing led to the other and I started spending nights at his house. It has been barely four weeks and this dude had the courage to ask me for money to help him pay rent and I said ( to myself) “But I’m not a sponsor” and now it seems like he will not talk to me anymore because I said no. Did I overreact? What do you think?

Wow. That's some audacity. So first of all, how did the one night stand turn into nights at his house? This seems to be the first complication.

Do you actually like the guy and you're telling yourself that you don't, and so the 'one night stand' was a way to get your foot in the door? And then, he's asking for money to pay rent, which seems desperate.

Maybe he is desperate, because he would have to be to ask you, an irregular visitor, to contribute to his upkeep.

Perhaps he feels like since you've been there a lot then he can ask for money, but if he hadn't been sleeping with you, what exactly was his plan to pay his rent? That seems strange.

The guy is in a strange situation. If your heart moves you out of sympathy, feel free to contribute a little, but don't go back. You didn't overreact.

That request was unfounded, and he's being a child by not talking to you for saying no. What else will he overreact about that you will (inevitably) say no to? You don't need that kind of negativity in your life.

 

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