I do not know who Fiolina, the enviable laugh of my amazing life, has been listening to recently. Nor do I know what she has been smoking. What I know is that whatever she has been smoking, and whomever she has been listening to, have made her a totally different woman from the one I met and married.
You see, the Fiolina I married several years ago was a very humble lady, and a religiously submissive wife. With my help – through family mentoring - she would gain lots of intelligence, and grow in confidence, but even when she exercised her confidence, it was with respect and humility.
But the Fiolina that I now host in my palatial residence is tough, with arrogant confidence. And she is treating me like I am a visitor in the house, a house, whose loan am still servicing.
As everyone knows, being a deputy is a very demanding job which really occupies me physically, emotionally, psychologically and more importantly, mentally.
Even during this Covid-19 period, I am still expected to go to school to ensure everything is running smoothly. Ideally, this should be the headmaster’s role, but you all know Bensouda, our female head.
The next time you will see her around will be a month after schools re-open.
All she does is issue instructions to me, asking me to regularly visit and spend a full day in school at least once a week. And Bensouda has lots of informers around such that if I do not go to school, she would know. She then also asked me to ensure that other teachers as well visit the school.
As you would expect, almost all teachers I talked to did not like the idea of coming to school at all.
“My heart is willing to come to school,” said Mrs Atika. “But I do not want to risk contracting Corona.” She reminded me that she was almost 50 years old, and therefore at risk.
Kuya did not even answer my calls while Lena, her bad hair notwithstanding, told me to forget about it. Only one teacher agreed to be coming to school, regularly. Nzomo.
“I am an extrovert and staying at home is not working for me,” she said.
We agreed that Nzomo would be going to school once a week, while I would also go once a week. We had not planned to go to school on the same day, but I must have been idle some day three weeks ago and decided to pass by the school on a day Nzomo was there.
That first day, we did not even greet each other, sat miles apart in the staffroom, keeping our masks on.
“How is mzee?” I asked her about Kuya, the senior master with whom they have a baby. Early last year they were staying together.
“Don’t ever mention that man to me,” she said, changing the topic. We talked about other things. I left her in school since it was her day to be in school.
Two days later was my day, and to my pleasant surprise, Nzomo passed by. I was in my office. This time we greeted each other, and although we sat a little far, it was not as far as we had two days earlier. I got to learn that she had separated with Kuya late last year. He left me at school that day, but she had kept me company for the better part of the day.
And so, for the last few weeks, she has been joining me in school on my day, while I also join her during her days. All of a sudden, going to school during this period, is now something I look forward to. Even when Lena called me asking to be allocated a day, I told her all days were fully covered.
Instead of just sitting in school, we decided to start doing some schoolwork for willing students. They would come to collect assignments on one day, then return for marking once they are done.
Nzomo and I were in school last Friday. We no longer feared Corona and did not sit far from each other. The last two students left at 3.30pm, but it wasn’t around 7pm when I got home.
I arrived home to find a fuming Fiolina. “I will not allow you in this house ever!” she declared. “Go away and never come back here, Never!” she shouted, throwing at me a bag with my possessions.
“Go and stay with that Nzomo now that she is no longer Kuya’s wife!” I tried to tell her I didn’t know that Nzomo was staying alone. “How can you snatch a woman from your own staff-mate?” she closed the door, and anytime I tried to speak, she started wailing loudly, attracting neighbours. Those who know me will tell you that I do not like noise, so I left slowly and went to my parents’ place where I slept in my simba.
Apostle Elkana, The Revered Spiritual Superintendent of The Holiest of All Ghosts Tabernacle Assembly, called me yesterday and said that he was willing to reconcile the two of us.
Whether we reconcile or not, at the very minimum, we must agree that next time we differ, it is Fiolina who should leave my house, not the other way around!