Time changes all things... everything!

I got this three-word statement from a song written by Tommy Duncan. The lyrics tell of a failed romance and of the hurt that has healed. Each verse ends with: “… time changes everything.”

I thought to myself, what and or who is this ‘Time’ that changes everything, and what exactly is this “Everything”? I decided to consult my wing man, Mr-know-it-all, Google. Time, he said, “is the part of existence that is measured in minutes, hours, days, years… etc. For “Everything”, he said is, “all that exists, all that relates to the subject, all sorts of other things.” It now made crystal sense.

Time has proven to be the only determiner of the course and purpose of all things as well as persons. Where I am today, for instance, in terms of thoughts, plans, ambitions, opinions, ideas, beliefs, mistakes, lessons… isn’t where I was five years ago. Neither is it where I thought I would be. I am completely far from my expectations back then. What is that? I call it time. Time changed everything.

Flash back to five years ago: I was in a well established fruity relationship. Not one of those games we’re pulling nowadays. No! We were committed to a forever together. We literally promised ourselves to each other. And not just by words but also actions. By the way, I just remembered we would be getting married this year.

Back then, my ideal age for marriage was 25. I would have done everything to keep this relationship going. But time threw a monkey wrench in our works. Everything changed. Fast forward to today, I am decisively single. In fact, I do not even have an ideal age for marriage... time changes everything.

SLOWLY BUT SURELY

After this relationship failed, I was left in a state of depression. I mean, he had been my everything. My end, my beginning, my point of focus… the bird on the patch. So when he left, he left with my everything. As in, it felt like the end of living. So, as for me, when I see persons ending their lives and or those of their beloved partners out a beautiful love gone sour, or even sulk themselves foolish in tears, I don’t judge. I know exactly how one gets there. I wanted to disappear, go on a self-induced coma or something.

The reality was too much to handle at that point. Then, I believed them when they said, “if you love someone, let them go, if they come back, they were meant for you.” And so we kept circling each other round and round, time after time until time finally changed everything. Today, that same time has changed what I believed to, “if you love them, let them go, if they come back, set them on ‘fire’”. I believe this too will change.

Time has seen the change of our government system, the massive growth in technology, infrastructure, agribusiness, women and youth empowerment. Time has seen our nation grow. Maybe slow but steadily.

Time has brought in different beliefs and practices; so what if they choose atheism, “my dress my choice”? So what if they choose to walk with their pants hanging far below their bottoms? The best we could all do is accept and move on. We don’t all have to agree with it, but we cannot impose our beliefs on others just because we think we are right and they are wrong. 

Time has seen me make bad decisions, some of which I regret and some that I am proud of because I used them to my advantage. I always advocate for regrets. Regret those mistakes whenever you need to. Slap yourself hard, knock your head on a rock terribly hard that you will never forget how painful it felt... that you will never, in your right senses, repeat it. All the same, do not dwell there, move on! Come out of those regrets bigger and better. Hit the road again and again till it gets so hot. Time changes everything....

Ours is the generation that takes advantage of every opportunity that knocks on your door and even your neighbour’s door. Use everyone that looks usable. Even me. Step on everything, even on hot coal, to get to where you should be. Time changes friendships, acquaintances, relations… Use them to your advantage while they exist. Time changes everything.

Jeniffer Wangari blogs at https://jennyssecho.wordpress.com. Carol Mandi resumes next week.