What I know for sure about fashion and life

There is a lot to be said for experience in fashion, lifestyle and beauty. And I have to say, I have generous amounts of that thanks to my upbringing, eternal curiosity, experimentation and sheer audacity. So I thought, maybe I could share, thanks to Oprah, the 33 things that I know for sure about these three things I know.

1. There will never be a universal look. At no point in time will all women ever be beautiful to all eyes. And this has nothing to do with women, and everything to do with power brokers. Who are these people you ask? Male fashion designers, magazine editors, artists of legend, your mother, the male gaze, your own gaze and of course, social media. Once in a while, your kind of beauty will get its turn, whether that it a curvy behind, a full lip, redbone or yellow bone, tall and lean, petite and pretty, straight up Caucasian - (who are we kidding, blonde and blue eyes is timeless) - mixed race, light skin.

2. Cameras tell the truth. Mirrors are more like soft focus lenses. This is why you have to take 300 selfies to find two good ones and blow yourself kisses every time you walk past a mirror.

3. The moment you find a trend that works spectacularly for you, it will be time for a new trend. It’s not your fault. What goes up must come down. Trends shift whether you are ready for them or not and when you are, it’s time to move on.

4. No matter what makeup artistes say, there is never going to be the one perfect foundation for your skin. You will have to experiment and blend, conceal, find your light, buy a series of stipple brushes, blenders, get frustrated, give up on foundation at least once a month then eventually realise your bliss lies not in a single colour, but in your ability to embrace diversity on your own face.

5. Every woman needs to learn to walk in heels. I’m sorry, but there is just no way around this. Consider it a life skill.

6. A woman needs two things. The perfect red lip and the perfect nude lip. Finding one is a blessing, Finding both is a rarity. But, quest you must.

7. Too many women ignore silver and go for gold.

8. Your biggest beauty and fashion influencers will always be your parents. Once you accept this, you can make peace with whichever path you chose to take.

9. You will never be satisfied with your own looks.

10. What looks good on a friend will not look good on you. But sometimes what you think looks good on you can look much better on a friend. The same applies to perfume.

11. Speaking of, every woman should make a point to smell good.

12. Working out is everything the universe says it is and then some. Get some of that in. It does wonders for your mind and energy levels. Which might just make you so confident you stop wearing makeup altogether. And wouldn’t that be a win.

13. Acne is both inspiring and heartbreaking. More heartbreaking, reactions to it. More inspiring, your response.

14. There is a reason black goes with everything. But then again, so does navy, white and even more critically, red.

15. Be more adventurous with your style. Take risks. Make mistakes. Laugh at yourself. It’s never that serious.

16. Except when it is. Like live TV, red carpets, interviews, THAT date, your ruracio.

17. Say yes to that red carpet invite and slay.

18. Learn how to do your own makeup.

19. Use hand cream and do your nails. They don’t have to be claws. Just be kind to hands.

20. Love your skin. It’s the only one you’ve got.

21. Every year make a wish list of all the things you want for your hair, skin, wardrobe and lifestyle. And systematically shop them till the end of the year. Then do it all over again.

22. Sleep. Seven and a half hours will do you a world of good.

23. If you feel off, talk to a friend and get yourself checked out.

24. It pays to be friends with your mother.

25. It pays to be friends with your sister(s).

26. Spend your free time learning more about what makes you tick.

27. When you meet a girl under 10, compliment her with truth.

28. Do the same for a boy under 10.

29. Someday, even though you might find this hard to believe, you will look at yourself in the mirror the way a man looks at the love of his life.

30. My opinions and perspective will always go against the grain. That is how I know women who embrace their femininity eliminate a great deal of angst when it comes to the magical three decision-making.

31. Read my column every Sunday. It’s a gem. That’s why it’s still here 13 years later.

32. Vote for me. I have been nominated in the category Fashion Journalist of The Year (for the 6th time) 2018. I won in 2014. Vote via email when you send my code to SFW FJY 02 and via website on www.swahilifashionweek.com

33. Did I also mention doesn’t ask, doesn’t get? That applies to everything.