My friend wants this job, but I don’t want her on my team
My friend is not a good worker, so the last thing I’d want is to have her on my team. I however don’t want to lose her friendship, what do I do? PHOTO | FOTOSEARCH
What you need to know:
- She obviously assumes that she is a good performer, that is why she has applied for the position.
- Do not judge her too harshly therefore before you have a discussion.
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Q. Mid last year, I was promoted to the position of manager. This year, two senior internal positions were advertised in the department I head. One of my colleagues, who I consider a friend because she visited me when I got my first child two years ago, asked me to second her for one of the positions. Unfortunately, she is not a good worker, so the last thing I’d want is to have her on my team. I however don’t want to lose her friendship, what do I do?
Your friendship with colleagues should not grant them unfair favours from you. Be careful therefore, that this friendship does not influence work-related decisions.
That said, your friend is taking undue advantage of your position, which is unfortunate. One of the responsibilities of managers is to develop talent and to give frequent feedback on performance to staff.
Talking to your friend’s current manager will give you more insight on how to deal with her request. Based on the discussion with her boss, give her candid feedback on her performance and offer to mentor her or ask her to choose a suitable mentor.
She obviously assumes that she is a good performer, that is why she has applied for the position. It could be that her objectives are not clear or that she lacks proper supervision.
She could also be in a job that is not suited to her competencies and interest. Do not judge her too harshly therefore before you have a discussion.
Since she needs your feedback, inform her that her application will be considered alongside other candidates since it is a competitive process. If she feels wronged by this feedback, then I am afraid you might lose this friendship, so start counting your losses.
You must assess what is more important to you, your professional growth or this friendship. Bear in mind though, that you can have many more friends away from the workplace without jeopardising your job.
It is important to socialise with all your colleagues within the confines of the office, however, be careful how far you take this out of the boundaries of the office.
It is advisable that you stick to your league if you are interested in forming lasting friendship with colleagues since this will cushion you from similar situations in future.
Choices have consequences, prepare for any outcome therefore. What is important is to be seen as a fair manager who gives the best candidate the job irrespective of social affiliation.
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