My female colleague is sexually harassing me. How do I deal with it?

Q: At my place of work, the sexual harassment policy was recently reviewed. My employer emphasises that those who harass others and those who are harassed in silence will not be spared. My colleague has been making advances at me, moves I always dismiss. I have talked to her about it without success. I like her as a professional  and we make a formidable team. How can I navigate through this?

It is commendable that your employer has a policy that safeguards employees from any form of harassment. However, threatening them with disciplinary action if they do not speak up is ill-advised and may not create a safe environment to escalate a grievance.

More emphasis should focus on creating higher levels of awareness and ensuring there is a reporting process that employees have confidence in. My point is, if the process was clear and safe, you would not be seeking my advice but would be confident that your complaint would be addressed without prejudice.

Further, with awareness, your colleague would know where to draw the line without much prompting from you. That said, many good employers rely on feedback to improve employee relations so how you handle this may improve this policy to serve all parties better.

I see three options that you could consider. One, you confirm that you have talked to your colleague but have seen no change. I urge that you to speak to her again, this time being very clear and stating the intolerable behaviour. Referencing this policy and its consequences for such behaviour would be good to ensure she clearly understands your discomfort.

Finally, let her know that if this does not change, you will apply the policy as required. At this point, your colleague should be clearly aware that her advances will never be welcome, be smart enough to apologise and commit to a professional relationship.

If this does not create the desired change, your second option is to escalate through the channels provided in the policy. Raise your grievance as required and let the matter be handled by your employer’s safeguarding team whose primary duty is to protect you by ensuring you are working in an environment free of any form of harassment.

You can be sure that by the time this process takes place, your professional relationship will not be the same. This should not be a difficult situation as I am sure there are many colleagues who are equally good and professional and together, you can make a better team.

Your final decision will depend on outcome of option two. If your grievance is not resolved to your satisfaction, the work environment becomes too toxic and unsafe and this may affect your productivity. You may consider transferring to a different department or looking for a better employer. It is said that while forgetting is difficult, remembering is worse.

Mwikali Muthiani - Managing Partner, MillennialHR (@MwikaliN; [email protected])