My fiancé wants me to quit my job and become his partner

Q: My fiancé and I are both graduates of tourism management. While I went for employment, he started his own tours and travel agency, which has grown steadily in the last two years. He has begun goading me to join him and "build our future empire". While I'm committed to a future together, I wish to pursue my career independently. Resigning from my job is off the table. I fear that this might bring friction between us. Please advise me.

Unemployment rates in Kenya continue rising day by day, and it’s very encouraging to see youth who are heeding the call from the government to get into self-employment and create.

That said, self-employment is not for the faint hearted, it takes years of patience, resilience and hard work to establish a stable profit-making business.

Most people who have succeeded in business would never consider formal employment, where the employers’ rules and regulations must be followed, and where the salary is fixed unlike in self-employment where one has freedom over how much money to take home as compensation.

You are privileged to be working in a structured organisation. How can you use your experience to boost your fiancé’s business even as you stay employed?

Encourage him to pursue his dream, and give him moral and even professional support as you get to understand the industry.

Put down the gratifications you receive from your current job and then approach him and explain why you want to stay there.

You must convince him that you will be willing to join the business in future after he has established it and put in structures that will ensure that you continue earning the same salary and benefits.

KEY PRINCIPLES

One way of convincing him is also offering to help him out during your free time, unless there is conflict of interest between your employer and the business.

In these volatile economic times, it is risky to put all your eggs in one basket. If you are both working in the same business, any negative financial impact will affect both of you at the same time.

And what happens if you break up? Is the business registered in a way that makes it possible for you to share the proceeds even if you go separate ways?

You will feel aggrieved if you leave empty-handed yet you put in considerable effort and time.

Could it be that he is insecure and therefore wants to prevent you from meeting other suitors? If so, find out what you can do to reassure him.

How stable is your current job? Are there opportunities for career growth? Are they offering you a competitive salary and benefits?

Do you think you can grow as a professional if you joined your fiancé in business? Is there room for flexible working hours at your company such that you can work with your fiancé part time?

Consider all aspects and then make an informed decision, but try to be mindful of your relationship. How you resolve this issue will be a good indicator of how you will resolve future differences. Have a blessed Easter break!

Mwikali Muthiani - Managing Partner, MillennialHR (@MwikaliN; [email protected])