What can I do about this boss who hates everything about me?

One of the most frequently cited reasons by people for resigning from their jobs is a poor working relationship with a line manager.

PHOTO | FILE| NATION MEDIA GROUP

What you need to know:

  • Learning how to cope with one’s boss is a fundamental part of managing one’s career.

  • People can have meaningful working relationships even when there is insufficient natural chemistry between them.

I really don’t like my boss. He does not appreciate anything I do. We do not get along well and argue all the time for flimsy reasons. The other day he abused me in the presence of my colleagues, which made me very upset. I am wondering whether there is another way out for me besides leaving the organisation.

One of the most frequently cited reasons by people for resigning from their jobs is a poor working relationship with a line manager. Employees may throw in the towel for this reason even when other factors that positively enhance their job satisfaction and engagement such as competitive pay and a conducive working environment are in place. A working relationship usually has two parties, both of whom have a role to play in building and nurturing its health. It would be presumptuous to assign blame to either party without fully appreciating the circumstances of a fractured working relationship.

Assuming the relationship was initially in order when you started reporting to him, what conversations preceded or stoked your sentiments? Is it about his competence? Is it about his conduct? Is it about his personality? Have you raised the issue with him or his boss? Have you taken the matter to HR for advice and support?

You have indicated how you feel about your boss. Do you know what he feels about you? Can you associate his posture towards you with elements related to either your conduct or performance? Is your performance record commendable? Do you live in consonance with your organisation’s values? Could you effectively defend yourself against the accusation of disrespecting or undermining others including your boss? Do other colleagues who report to your boss feel the way you do?

Few people have the luxury of choosing their bosses. There will always be some aspects concerning a boss that you would want to change and this would equally be true with your team members if you were the boss. Learning how to cope with one’s boss is a fundamental part of managing one’s career. People can have meaningful working relationships even when there is insufficient natural chemistry between them. There is a price to pay in every relationship and, thankfully, with a boss, it is usually only for a time.

If, despite your best efforts to resolve the matters at hand, you still experience nothing but torment in the working relationship with your boss, it might be time to unpack your shelves, unbridle your noose and find a new job.

Fred Gituku, Human Resources Practitioner ([email protected])