The imposter syndrome

In my career as a journalist, I have sat down for tens of interviews with high-flying executives and successful businesswomen. Other than the contagious enthusiasm that most of them have, the one thing that has stuck with me over the years is the self-doubt that many of these women harbour.

Even with tons of evidence of their success, I have met successful women who will not take a compliment. “I don’t even know how it happened. I think I was just in the right place at the right  time,” she will say.

I have met women who have built successful businesses from the ground up but when you ask her about the interviewing her, she will say, “I am not sure I have things to say.”

The term ‘imposter syndrome’ was coined in 1978 by Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imesa, a couple of American clinical psychologists. Imposter syndrome is basically deep-seated self-doubt. Unlike the inferiority complex, which afflicts people who haven’t achieved much, the imposter syndrome affects high-achieving women.

Men don’t have a problem walking into their boss’s office and negotiating a pay raise. But a woman who is unhappy with her salary? She takes to venting her dissatisfaction to her friends and colleagues. One afternoon, after some prodding from her friends at work, she decides she has reached the end of her rope and marches to the boss’s office. When she gets to the door, she pauses for a few minutes, recollecting her thoughts and rehashing her speech. A few minutes turn into half an hour and when the boss leaves his office to go for a meeting you see what looks like relief wash over her face.

“I will try another day. He is too busy today,” she tells her friends and herself (especially herself) as she stands up, straightens her dress and goes back to her workstation and the life she has grown to hate.

FRAUD SYNDROME

What is wrong with this picture? She is a victim of the imposter syndrome. Despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, she feels underqualified for her job. “I go through my day at work afraid that someone will uncover this fact,” she says. “Every time I finish an assignment, I worry that I will not be able to tackle the next one,” she will tell you.

Even those who have found fame and fortune are not spared. Nobel laureate Maya Angelou once admitted that despite having written 11 books, some of which were bestsellers, she kept thinking that a time would come when she would be exposed as a fraud.

Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Facebook, has also admitted to suffering from the fraud syndrome – and this despite being a successful author and having an illustrious career as a technology executive. You can count award-winning actresses Kate Winslet and Emma Watson in that lot, too. Yes, you are in splendid company.

The imposter syndrome directly affects a woman’s earning power. A woman who isn’t confident in her abilities will desist from putting herself in the limelight. Her fear of being exposed will keep her from taking up projects which put her in the spotlight. She will not speak up to share her ideas during meetings. Her career will take a hit. When you take a look around the corporate world, you will realise that the people who get ahead aren’t necessarily the ones who are the most skilled or the ones that have accumulated the most experience. The people who get to the top are the ones who shout the loudest.

There is a difference between self-doubt and humility. While humility is a self-awareness that allows you to admit your failings, the imposter syndrome comes from a place of lack of self-awareness. Unlike the imposter syndrome, humility does not evoke feelings of anxiety. It is that calm acceptance of both your strengths and weaknesses. Humility allows you to own your successes.

Do you constantly feel like you do not deserve the space that you occupy at your workplace? Are you uncomfortable talking about your successes? Do you ever feel guilty for getting promotions? Do you feel like others around you are more qualified for the job you hold? Yes? The very first step out of this bind is acknowledging that you are afflicted by the imposter syndrome. It will also help to document your successes. If you internalise these enough, you will gain confidence.

The world is competitive. The playing field is not level. Doing exceptionally well isn’t enough. To get you what you deserve, you must learn not to be afraid to blow your own trumpet.