The name change debate

She had been practising as a lawyer for five years by the time she was officially married. As Rosalinda Nduati, she had been to many courtrooms representing litigants who, after several successful cases, referred new clients to her.

But when she got married to Jeremy Mutero, she decided to adopt her husband’s name, as is the norm. But the name Rosalinda Mutero did not click with her clients.

“I became a completely different lawyer. There was a lot of confusion among potential clients who had been referred to me and given my earlier name,” says Rosalinda. Arguments always arose among them whether I was still the lawyer they had been sent to.

Two weeks after her wedding, she gave up the new name and reverted to her old name. But in her effort to retain her professional name and still maintain her new marital status, she opted to change her name to Rosalinda Nduati-Mutero.

And this sorted her identity problem at Anjarwalla &Khana Advocates, a law firm in Nairobi.

For Dr Koki Mulli-Kinagwi, who works for a non-governmental organisation (NGO), only an affidavit could convince her bank that Koki Mulli and Koki Mulli-Kinagwi were one and the same person.

In 2008, she had received a cheque which bore the latter name while her account details bore the former name. According to the bank, the cheque did not belong to her. “It was easy to understand their concern, only an affidavit saved the situation,” says Dr Mulli-Kinagwi.

The two women are a statistic of modern professional women who experience a problem with their names when they get married long after they have settled in their careers.

By the time a family comes along, such women have gone through various courses and trainings and their certificates are issued in their maiden names.

They already have built a clientele or cut a niche in their professional fields and dropping their surnames completely changes their identities.

For 10 years, Koki had used her father’s name and though at her workplace , colleagues have adopted the new name when she got married, it has not been easy outside the office.

Koki’s sister, Kalekye, a lawyer in another NGO, got married last year and is not in a hurry to drop her father’s name.

“I fear the process of having to drop dad’s name to accommodate my husband’s. The easier way is to affix his at the end of my old name which everyone knows me by,” says Kalekye.

The sisters further say they respect the role their father played in their lives and also love their husbands and want to be identified with them. 

Kalekye says, “ That is why my name has been Kalekye Mulli-Muigai since I got married. It makes me complete because it recognises my father as well as my husband.”

The process of replacing a legally married woman’s maiden name with that of her husband’s is tedious and usually requires that the husband presents himself physically before the registering officer.

Most people simply find this too time consuming. For those who do not have a marriage certificate, there must be consent from the parents.

This requirement isn’t a cup of tea for any rising modern woman. Last week, the Ministry of Immigration set out to adjust the rules regarding change of names on identity cards by married women but they may not be any less tedious.

Instead of seeking a parent’s approval, married women seeking to change their maiden names will still have to seek the approval of their husbands and the local chief.

Several women interviewed by Saturday Magazine this week said they have built their names in their chosen careers over the years which they are not willing to change because they feel by doing so, they cease to exist, at least on the professional and social realms.

One such person is Kathleen Openda-Mvati, a former newscaster and television show host. Her trade mark name, Kathleen Openda, has graced media circles for about 20 years and she believes that by adopting a totally new name, she throws away a brand that she has nurtured over the year.

“My name is basically a brand name and has been there for two decades. You cannot just change it overnight and remain in business as usual. It will definitely take time before people realize that you are the same person,” said Kathleen.

However, she introduces another explanation for having a hypernated surname.

“He (my husband) wanted us to acknowledge the new status and so he asked that I add his name on mine. So for “peace in the house”, I decided there was no harm in adding it to mine,” said the media practitioner.

The brand name bit also haunted Pinky Ghelani, a former radio personality and magazine editor. She has also spent several years building her name.

“Changing my name would mean starting to builda new brand all over again. It cannot be an easy venture,” she says.

According to Pinky, any name change would confuse people. And there is no justification for such a mess especially if there is an easier way out.

“I am happy to be Mrs Pinky Ghelani-Raj. Raj is a name with a nice ring to it. I also cherish the sound of it,” she says jokingly.

On a personal level, Pinky says carrying the name of her father along is her special way of remembering him.

“I lost dad at a tender age and I love carrying his name forward,” she says.

For Cecilia Rague-Kaisha, an underwriter at the African Trade Insurance Agency (ATI), marriage is a continuation of life which started at childhood and changing the name would either mean the end of her or a phase in her life.

“I have made so many friends and my record in all the things I had done before marriage had my original name, “ she says.

Cecilia had worked for about two years before she got married and admits there was “an element of laxity” in her failure to update the new names on her documents.

“But now, I think I am on a journey to drop my father’s name altogether and adopt my husband’s,” she says.

The more academic and professional certificates one has, the more the fear of any attempt to change names.

Mrs Florence Jaoko-Simbiri, the chairperson of the Kenya National Commission on Human Rights (KNCHR) thinks that with her heap of testimonials which she attained before marriage, it is unthinkable that she can try to change them to her husband’s name.

The certificates aside, the human rights crusader believes that incorporating her husband’s name to her father’s is a real sign of love.

It is clear changing a name is not a bread and butter for many professional women .

A lot comes into play, the women agree, and issues such as education, career and age only complicate matter further. The women’s first hand accounts would give new meaning to the cliché ‘ What is in a name? ‘

Apparently, the higher ones move up the professional or business ladder, the stronger a brand one makes for oneself and therefore the harder it becomes to drop that name for a new one.

Other quarters suggest that retaining the father’s name is yet another way for the modern woman to assert her independence.

What is clear is the fact that the longer one settles in marriage, the more complex the name-changing affair becomes.

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