MWOLOLO: I'd rather have a tall, dark, hardworking man than a handsome one

I have been mulling over this for a while now. No. For long enough. Since my early twenties when I met my first crush. Hmm… He was tall, with a dark, smooth face, strong legs and arms. Ja Karateng was also among the most brilliant students in class. It is like he knew it that he had the physical appeal, as he walked with a swag in and out of lecture rooms. It still excites me to think of it even today.  

The proverbial tall, dark and handsome man is hardly a strange thing. Think Chilobae, of late. The Chilobae craze that took over social media in the last few weeks reminded me of Ja Karateng.

What is it about the tall, dark and handsome man that fascinates women so much?

Speaking of TDHs (As they are sometimes referred to), do you remember 2009 when Akon came to Kenya for a concert and left women breathless with desire? His baritone, electrifying performance in sagging jeans and his bare-chested six-pack literally brought the show into a standstill. That was Akon for you. A perfect model for a tall, dark, handsome man. Hmm…

Yes, the TDH is aesthetically appealing but most also leave a trail of broken hearts along with sleepless nights for the women who pine for them and long for their love . The so-called tall, dark handsome men should not sit pretty and feel so good. They must earn it. Apart from having the physical attributes of being tall and dark, as a man you can only be handsome if your hand has got something to offer. I mean, hand-some. Get it?

While tall, dark and handsome may seem discriminatory, there is actually some evolutionary evidence that guides this preference. However, if you happen to be a short, balding, red-faced, pale fellow of average looks, fear not, women are attracted to other traits. Often, how a lesser-attractive man acts is more important to a woman than what they look like. Besides, the modern definition of handsome still remains – a hand that has got something to offer. 

BACKED BY RESEARCH

Research has shown that being tall gives a man an evolutionary advantage over a competitor who is short. Studies conducted in the West have shown that it pays well to be tall. Sounds discriminative? In 2009, researchers from the University of Sydney and the Australian National University in Canberra compared the pay of 20,000 Australians with data such as height and weight. They found out that short men were actually ‘short changed’ as a 6ft tall man can expect 1.5 per cent more than a workmate who is 5ft 10in.

Globally, height is equated with good health and athletic ability. Tan or dark skin equates to spending more time outside, having more leisure time and being less susceptible to certain skin disorders. Darker skin tones have a tendency to hide flaws while whiter skin sets off broken blood vessels, bruises and flushing of the skin and tan lines. Each individual is different and part of the preference for darker skinned males may be due to cultural norms which change over time.

Tall, dark and handsome seems to be quite neutral to me. Dark, tall and handsome is a cliché and a staple phrase use to describe a guy that falls into the hottie, cutie, eye candy category. However, this is not to say that a guy with blond hair and medium height cannot be just as hot! You do not have to be a Chilobae, or a replica of Akon to win your dream woman.  Plenty of average looking men manage to find partners who find them appealing.

No matter what your skin colour or physical build, there are certain attractive features and traits that you can control. You can make a choice to work hard and be that successful bae. Yes, you can become dark, tall and handsome by simply working on yourself. In modern times, women prefer to date and settle down with a handsome bae. A bae whose hand has got something to offer. Hand-some.